Tamriel Campaign

The campaign takes place in the land of Tamriel and is inspired by the Elder Scrolls games.

Campaign Notes

Here are incomplete and sparse notes of the campaign so far.

2022-11-01

The party is joined today by Yatika, a tiefling rogue; Ratchett, a high elf cleric and Ralsei, a goat wizard. Twig is absent. The rest of the party are Horace, Ikle, Toga and Ninzel.

The party have just finished speaking to a vampire. After initially trying to attack the vampire, the party find, to their embarrassment, that the vampire does not feast upon the blood of humans, and is therefore a friend to them. Ikle locates the gardening shed in the graveyard and takes a shovel, which they proceed to carry with them on their back.

In need of information about vampires in the area, Yakita employs a beggar to take a written note, requesting information, to her contact. Ralsei happens to have a good (nat. 20) knowledge of the history of the city. He tells the party what he knows of the city.

“This city was run by elves before humans took over. It’s not big for vampires. The massive tower in this city is a world pillar; it helps to hold the world up. If it is destroyed, the world will end.”

Toga asks what the darkest place in the city might be. Ninzel suggests the sewers.

Yakita speaks to a guard, “Bit of a weird one; vampires. Don’t know of any, do you?”. The line of questioning leads nowhere, beyond what the party learned from the city newspaper, the ‘Black Horse Courier’.

The party split up, half investigating the tombs, and half going to the library to look for information.

In the tombs, Ralsei casts ‘light’ on his scarf, exclaiming “Let’s go graverobbing!”. The party discover an empty tomb where someone should be buried. The name on the tomb is Martin Septim.

The entire party reconvenes at the library. Ratchett, Yakita, Ninzel and Ralsei enter. Toga, Horace and Ikle go to the pub.

Toga speaks to the bartender.

Ikle: “I just wanted eggs, man.”

In the library, John has been found drawing. John helps the party by finding records of deaths that look like vampire attacks. He finds many events, with no apparent correlation; except that they happen every few days, and occur only rarely in the city’s noble district. The party agree that this supports Ninzel’s theory that the vampire is using the sewers to travel all over the city. John, meanwhile, accidentally breaks his wand. Yakita is called urgently away, and leaves the party.

To the sewers. Horace lifts the manhole cover. Ralsei lights his scarf. The party move towards the Imperial Tower. Horace, physically the strongest of the party, leads. Ikle trails, not letting Toga travel behind them for fear of backstabbing. Ralsei tries to enthuse the party, or the ‘Fun Gang’, as he now calls them.

The party encounter a vampire in the sewer. Horace attempts a physical attack on the vampire, but he slips on some sewage and falls. Ralsei casts ‘charm person’ on the vampire, but even this fails to persuade them to become vegan and stop feasting on human blood.

2022-11-15

The party today consists of Adam, Rosen, Horace, Ikle, and Twig. They are engaged in fighting a vampire. To begin, Ikle casts Spirit Shroud, which increases the effectiveness of their melee attacks. They continue engaging the vampire in close combat with their quarterstaff. Twig casts Ray of Frost to inflict more damage. Rosen transforms into her bear form and also engages the vampire in close combat. The vampire turns on Rosen, inflicting significant damage. Ikle kills the vampire with a blow from their quarterstaff, aided by Spirit Shroud.

The vampire bursts into flames, leaving only a small pile of ashes. Ikle attempts to loot the ashes for any useful items, but finds nothing. The party agree that their time in the sewers should come to an end, and Rosen lifts the manhole to take them back to street level. Horace, separated for the moment from the rest of the party, is in a large chamber within the sewers. He finds a bundle of notes, and takes them quickly before searching the sewers for another exit.

Once out of the sewers and on the street, Rosen quickly causes a commotion in her bear form, and transforms back into their human shape. The party, minus Horace who is still searching the sewers for an exit, head to the pub for a well-earned breakfast of eggs. Horace eventually leaves the sewers and follows the trail of frightened people who claim to have seen a bear. He catches up with the rest of the party at the pub and takes a nap in one of the pub’s cosy fireside chairs.

Ikle, seated at a table with the rest of the party, begins to rant about Horace. She quite clearly dislikes him, and isn’t afraid to dish out criticism within his earshot. After a while, Horace wakes and presents the notes that he took from the sewer room to the rest of the group. Ikle maintains their stern demeanour around Horace, as the group examine the now egg-splattered documents. They are the personal notes of the writer, and as such have no name attached. Twig’s insight into the handwriting style suggests that the penmanship is that of someone old and learned. The paper is of high quality and would be expensive to purchase.

Horace, on taking a second look at the notes, seems to have forgotten the detail which they contain. This only annoys Ikle more and she pushes past him to see the notes for herself. She identifies mentions of daedra magic in the notes, as well as mentions of Molag Bal. This ignites a memory in Twig that Molag Bal is an important religious figure. His symbol is present in a few places in the notes.

“He’s, like, one of the main evil ones”, interrupts John, whose encyclopaedic knowledge of encyclopaedias had yet to benefit the party today. The group summarise their thoughts.

“Killing the vampire has prevented the portal being opened, for now” realises Ikle, out loud. The party decide to venture to High Rock, as the most likely location of more vampires.

“Let’s go to the market and negotiate with the traders there for passage to High Rock”, suggests Rosen. On their way out of the pub, Ikle is tripped by Horace’s foot. As well as souring relations between Horace and Ikle even further, Rosen becomes annoyed at this latest petty act of hostility and gives them both the cold shoulder.

At the market, Ikle quickly finds some traders from High Rock, and negotiate with them passage to their home in return for some labour unloading goods from the incoming caravan. Everyone agrees to meet at the same spot at nine o’clock the next morning.

As the group have the rest of the day to spend in the Imperial City, they go to the library to research in preparation for the journey to High Rock. Twig make a copy of a map of High Rock, while Ikle and Horace read histories of the royal families. They pick up on several references to vampire families in High Rock, who seem to be reclusive and as such there is little information about them. Rosen, impatient at the rest of the party, steals a book from the library without scanning it, and heads back to the pub for an evening email.

The police arrive at the pub in search of the stolen book. “I cast an invisibility charm on it” claims Rosen, which, while being the truth, is not taken seriously by the police. They search the pub and fail to find the invisible book. They do, however, find one that John had stolen from the library some time ago and had been too scared to return in the face of the fine for being late.

The next day, the party file groggily into one of the pub’s alcoves and order eggs for breakfast. As the taste of the delicious fried eggs wakes them up for the day ahead, they notice that several ‘wanted’ posters have been put up in the pub, appealing for information on the whereabouts of a stolen book. The party finish their eggs quickly, gather their belongings, and head quietly and without fuss to the marketplace to meet the traders from High Rock.

Arriving at the almost deserted marketplace promptly at 9am, the party quickly meet the traders who will be taking them to High Rock, and begin unloading the incoming shipment of eggs. Together, they make light work of it, Horace taking most of the burden upon himself. The caravan winds its way out of the city through the narrow alleyways until reaching the start of the main road to High Rock. They are stopped at the city gates by guards in search of the lost book. Horace, in frustration at having already attracted attention from the police yesterday, speaks brusquely to the guards. To everyone’s surprise, but Ikle’s especially, the guards are intimidated by Horace into letting the caravan pass unsearched. Despite Horace’s excellent display of verbal dexterity in persuading the guards to let them pass, Ikle tests him further, and they argue for the extire journey to High Rock.

Two long days pass on the road from the Imperial City to High Rock. The road follows the border between Skyrim and Hammerfell. It is a mountainous route; treacherous during the colder months of the year, but safe at present. Whilst Horace and Ikle are arguing, Twig spends most of the journey admiring the scenery; he appreciates the magnificent views of both Hammerfell and Skryim which appear below him.

The caravan finally arrives at the capital of High Rock, and ends its journey in the marketplace. Disembarking from the wagons, the party find themselves in need of nourishment, and head straight to the nearest pub to order some eggs. “These are good, from the source”, vows Ikle, tucking into a plate of locally sourced eggs, which High Rock is famous for.

As the party are eating, they overhear rumours circulating around the pub. News has travelled from the Imperial City that a vampire was seen and killed a few days ago. Although kept quiet by the authorities for fear of the unrest it would provoke, before leaving the Imperial City, John had thoughtfully told anyone he could find to listen about Ikle’s magnificient victory.

Having finished their eggs, the party, led enthusiastically by John, head to the central library of High Rock. John attentively pores over hundreds of death records, trying to spot any that suggest the involvement of a vampire. One entry strikes him as interesting; a father, killed by his own son. The brief record, a single line in a register, tells that the son killed his father because he was instructed to by three unknown witches.

2022-11-29

This picture of Ninzel the gnome, sleeping in one of Twig’s wellies, was drawn by Georgia, who plays Ikle.

Horace, Ikle, Ninzel, Rosen and Twig are taken aback by John’s discoveries. “There are no other suspicious death records, though; not like we saw in the Imperial City,” says John, disappointment creeping into his voice as he realises that the party will likely not find the vampire they seek here and that they will soon force him to move on with them rather than allowing him to sit peacefully in his beloved library.

John hands Rosen a copy of the local newspaper, which contains enough drama, perhaps, to pique the party’s interest. On the front page, looking back at her, Rosen sees an exaggerated version of herself. A woman, wearing bright orange clothes, so bright in fact that they almost appear to be burning, and holding a book.

“That is not accurate!” complains Rosen, horrified at the new article. John recoils. “I’m not angry at you, John,” she clarifies. Apart from the inaccurate rendition of Rosen, the paper informs the party that the capital city is in lockdown, and that this happened before the theft of the book. They summise that, if rumours of the theft and of vampires continue, there is a risk of further lockdowns affecting other cities, and so the group must move quickly.

On overhearing the discussion, which is not difficult because the group are the only ones in the library speaking, Shadow joins the party. Shadow is a tiefling sorcerer who shares the group’s interest in hunting vampires.

Before long, the party begin to settle on a course of action. Currently in Warfrost, they will travel to the next city. Although they discuss hitching a lift with traders, as they did to reach Warfrost, they decide instead to walk the direct route through the mountains. From the marketplace, Twig buys some boiled eggs for the journey. John points at a stranger and shouts “They have the stolen book!”, providing a moment for the group to slip out of the city unnoticed.

For the most part, the party are comfortable and adept at walking on the mountain path. Ikle finds and takes two dead sparrow sized birds, in the hope that they will come in useful later on.

Ninzel trips on an egg which has fallen from a nearby nest. She grabs onto Shadow to stop herself from falling off of the path. Breaking the egg in the process has angered the nearby birds, which are roughly the size of eagles and not timid in the presence of people.

Rosen attempts to tame the closest eagle, which snaps back angrily. Ikle instead tries to intimidate the bird into silence, but this doesn’t work either. Horace steps forward and grabs the eagle by its skinny legs, which strikes fear into the remaining birds and the rest of the party, as they all distance themselves from Horace.

The party arrive at the edge of the city. Thinking back to their previous success is navigating through cities via their sewer networks, the group decide to scout around outside of the city wall for a sewer grating or similar opening by which to make their entrace. They succeed in finding a solid iron bar grating, which even someone of Ninzel’s tiny proportions would be unable to fit through.

Horace’s newly acquired pet eagle starts making a noise, though he manages to quieten it, but it remains on edge. Twig shares his boiled eggs with the rest of the party, while they think up a plan to get through the iron sewer grating. Shadow notices that the bars already have a lot of corrosion, and summises that casting Acid Splash might be enough to burn through them. She tries this, and while it has some effect, the bars still hold.

Horace steps up and, using his superior strength, attempts to lift the grating. He is unaware of his own strength, and breaks through the two bars he is grasping. Now knowing the force required to break each bar, he breaks through a few more, until there is a gap large enough for any of the party to fit through.

Before Horace has the chance to congratulate himself, Ikle decides that he should go into the sewer first and that they would bagsie going in last. On entering the sewer, Horace is forced to let go of the eagle, which is relieved to be getting away from its captor.

The whole party enter the sewer and quickly discover that it narrows and they cannot all fit through it. Rosen sends her rat familiar to investigate the far end of the passage. The rat understands the task perfectly, and climbs out of the toilet at the far end of the passage.

It is time for the party to advance through the sewers. Twig, the only one of the party wearing wellies, volunteers to go first.

“You won’t fit!” replies Ninzel, annoyed that Twig is being so daft.

“I’ll lend you my wellies, then”, offers Twig, sincerely. It is quite clear that Ninzel, being a gnome, would fit comfortably into one of Twig’s boots.

“For what, sleeping in?” asks Ninzel, rhetorically.

“Do elves have really tiny feet?” asks Twig, clutching at straws trying to find a solution that would allow Ninzel to borrow his wellies.

“I wouldn’t know, I’m a gnome!” replies Ninzel, agitated.

“You’re in the best place to see”, replies Twig, looking down at Ninzel, who barely comes up to his knee.

Ikle is becoming angry at the situation. Ninzel, without the benefit of Twig’s wellies to keep their feet clean, manages to follow Rosen’s rat familiar through the sewer passage and out through the toilet. They open a small back gate near to the sewer, allowing the party to enter the city.

It is the middle of the day and nobody is out and about on the streets. Most of the group feel silly as they realise that they may as well have access the city by burning down the massive, wooden front gate. Their disdain vanishes quickly, however, when they realise that they may as well break into any of the empty houses on the street and make full use of its amenities and luxuries. Ikle is the first in, and heads straight to the warm shower, in order to wash away the smell of the sewer. Twig claims that he does not smell of the sewer because he was wearing wellies, but while the rest of the party aren’t watching, he sneaks a puff from a scent bottle left on a counter.

With the suspicion that the distinct lack of people in the city is down to the vampire threat, the group feel safe in a home, as vampires cannot enter without being invited in. It is also noted that vampires cannot stand on holy ground, so any churches in the city would also be safe spaces for the party to stay. Once the group are refreshed, they wonder what to do next.

“Let’s go to the council building”, suggests Ninzel, “Because if a vampire is anywhere in this city, they’ll be there”.

The grand council building is only a short walk away from the house. The adventurers all attempt to make a stealthy entrance, in order to avoid attracting the vampire’s attention if one is, in fact, present. They all fail, misplacing their feet and making a loud noise on the stone floor. No vampires make themselves known, so the party all sigh with relief. The council building is as devoid of people as the rest of the city. At the heart of the building is a large room full of desks, all covered in paper and stationery. Ninzel takes as much of the interesting stationery as they can carry. Twig takes a single pencil pot, not knowing what to do with any of the myriad other items on the desks before him.

Ikle is mildly disappointed that there are no dead things in the council building for them to reanimate; the atmosphere in the building cannot be reanimated, because it was never alive to begin with. The group decide that they may find more of interest at the castle, which is located in the centre of the city. They already have some familiarity with its design and layout, as they have seen from afar the turrets which over the rest of the city.

They enter through the front gate. At one time, this would have been the gate between the interior of the castle and the wider world. As the city has grown up around the castle, it is now a theoretical inner line of defence should the city ever be attacked, but it is now mainly just for show. The party ploughs onwards, and walks straight into the throne room. Presumably, this room would have been so heavily guarded as to make locks redundant, and the group wander in as though it were a public marketplace. Horace heads straight to the throne and sits there, proudly. Ikle mutters something that the rest of the party don’t hear; probably for the best.

Shadow casts ‘Detect Magic’, to try to pick up any clues of a past magic presence, or perhaps even a curse. They get a strong sense of magic in the area. The feeling is vague, but it is something like a rift between worlds. This certainly piques the group’s interest, but not as much as the nearby corridor leading to the kitchen.

The group head to the kitchen and hunt for eggs. They find a good selection, but with no indication as to how long they’ve been here. “Jug test!” shouts Ninzel, pleased to be able to help the party with their practical knowledge. Twig fills a jug with water from the sink, and one by one, drops the eggs into it. Some of the eggs float. “They’ve gone off”, says Ninzel, helpfully. Ikle gathers up these eggs. Some of the eggs sink straight to the bottom. “Those are still good”, says Ninzel. Twig gathers them up and boils them on the stove. While the good eggs are cooking, Ikle throws some of the bad eggs at Horace, causing quite a commotion, with Twig watching the boiling pan, Shadow trying to keep anyone from getting too close to it and scalding themselves, and Ikle and Horace running around the cramped kitchen. Horace dodges all of the eggs, moving in a frenzy. The sudden burst of activity seems to have alerted someone to the group’s presence. Out of one of the kitchen cupboards steps what appears to be a baby dragon.

Ikle takes one of Twig’s good eggs, bow boiled and starting to cool, and attempts to feed it to the dragon. The dragon steps towards Ikle, barely nervous, and drops the meat it has been chewing on in order to taste the egg. Delighted at this gift, the dragon finishes the egg and sticks close to their new friend Ikle. “I’ll name him Vinnie, after Narvintos”, proclaims Ikle.

A narrow passage leads from the kitchen to a pantry. Ikle, Twig and Vinnie investigate. They find a small selection of food, most of it still edible. Ikle and Twig jump as they see a rat-like creature run out from under the shelves. Vinnie, with no look of surprise, chases the daedrat a short distance back into the corridor before catching and killing it.

Whilst drama has been taking place in the kitchen and the pantry, Horace has made his way to the castle’s grand drawing room. The party catch up to him and look around the room. There is a large cabinet in the centre of one of the walls; Ikle opens it to discover rows upon rows of exquisite crystal bottles containing liquids of varying colours, from almost clear to shades of red, purple and brown. Ninzel identifies and takes two of the bottles, containing fine aged wine and whiskey. Twig wonders silently whether it is a good idea for a gnome to be in possession of two bottles of strong alcohol, each of which is nearly as tall as herself, but doesn’t say anything out of not wanting to interfere. Ikle takes no interest in the alcohol, newly sober after drowning their sorrows and Narvintos’ death, and scouts around the rest of the walls, trying to find hidden rooms

Twig takes a look at the walls, to see if any portraits might offer clues as to the occupiers of the house. There are no portraits, only landscapes, which strikes him as slightly odd but unconcerning. There is ash in the fireplace. This is a comfort to the group; it suggests that whoever lives here is not a vampire, as vampires do not require heat. Still, the fireplace is stone cold, and the settling dust all over the room suggests that is a long time since anyone was here.

Horace heads out of the drawing room and investigates a guest bedroom, sumptuously decorated, but with nothing of interest. The next room is similar. He passes another entrance to the town and comes to the foot of a spiral staircase leading up to the roof. He and Ikle climb the staircase and come to the top of the castle ramparts.

“Hey! Come up here, you guys!” Ikle calls down to Ninzel, Rosen, Shadow and Twig. Horace follows immediately.

“Hey! There’s a portal!” Ikle calls back. “The outside isn’t the outside!”

Rosen looks out of the window and sees the same as Ikle, though slightly restricted by the field of view through the window.

The party hear a roaring sound, coming from outside. They all see, either from the top of the turret or the nearest window, that one of the towers has collapsed and that the sound is coming from there. Vinnie is clearly upset by the sound and stays close to Ikle, burying his head in their cape.

Ninzel, Ikle and Shadow investigate the tower more closely. They see a nest ahead of them. The sound is louder and clearer at this distance and Ikle turns back with Vinnie, who is quite clearly distressed by it. The sound is like that of a carcass being torn apart, and easily puts Ninzel and Shadow on edge. They come to the source of the sound; a tall figure, humanoid, but with all the features of a black dragon. From the claws protruding from its large, forked feet, to the dark, thick scales, to the glowing green eyes.

Communication with this figure is the party’s next concern. They would most likely speak Draconic, given their probable dragonborn heritage. Unfortunately, the only member of the party to speak Draconic is Ikle, who has taken Vinnie away. Ninzel goes to fetch Ikle. Ikle hands over Vinnie to Ninzel, who shields hiim from the noise.

Ikle speaks to the dragon, in Draconic, “Yo, dude, mind if we have a chat?”

The dragon finishes eating from the carcass, then looks blankly at Ikle, having not understood a word they said. Ninzel can see and hear the exchange, and shouts “Try Celestial!”

Twig shrugs his shoulders, and as the only speaker of Celestial in the party, steps up the the dragon and addresses him in Celestial. The dragon does not understand Celestial either, and becomes quite visibly annoyed at the people standing before him. He breathes out a little wisp of flame, to encourage the party to hurry up and find a language he does speak.

“Do you speak common?” asks Ninzel, as a last ditch attempt.

“Only if I have to,” replies the dragon, beginning to calm.

“What’s happening here?” asks Ninzel, relieved that the situation appears to be resolving itself in the party’s favour.

“I’m here in High Rock serving my lord.”

“Your lord?” asks Horace.

“Malog Bal is the lord” replies the dragon, stunned that Horace needed to ask the question.

Horace had forgotten all about Malog Bal, despite John’s earlier helpful explanation, “He’s, like, one of the main evil ones.”

Rosen tries to distract attention from Horace’s blunder. “What’s for dinner?” she asks, in a friendly tone.

“You’re dinner,” replies the dragon, in a matter-of-fact way. Rosen shudders.

Ikle defuses the newly tense situation by reanimating a dead goat, which appeared also to be on the dragn’s menu. In the ensuing confusion, the group manage to find an exit to a garden.

Exploring the garden, the party notice that there are plants here from two worlds. The world they are familiar with, and, as they move further into the garden, the world to which the portal leads.

Ikle is reluctant to continue into the garden, seeking encouragement from Ninzel. “Why do you want to go in there?” they ask Ninzel.

“Because it’s there and it’s weird,” comes the reply, which appears to put Ikle at ease.

All of the party follow Ninzel into the unknown garden.

2022-12-13

As they wander into the unknown garden, the pary see a dark figure in the distance. They walk closer. Twig realises first that the figure is a dwarf, and that they are also of the world that the party have just left.

“Do you speak common?” asks Ninzel.

“Yes,” replies the dwarf, “I got lost. This isn’t where I’m supposed to be; I’m searching for a book thief.”

It takes no time at all for everyone to realise that he is talking about Rosen. “You’re not having much luck, then?” asks Rosen.

“No, but maybe the others searching for the book thief are.”

“I doubt it,” says Twig, outwardly expressionless, but inwardly basking in the dwarf’s ignorance.

“I wasn’t looking where I was going, and wandered through a portal.” continues the dwarf.

“It’s a wonder you’re still alive.” says Ikle, in a manner similar to Twig’s as he made his comment. The party are not sure what to make of the newcomer; he seems nice enough to have around, but of little use in the party’s quest to hunt vampires, and of no use whatsoever in his own quest to find the book thief. Ikle starts walking. Twig, and then the rest of the party, follow.

On coming to the edge of the garden, the party find that they are near the top of a hill. The landscape spreads out ahead of them. Everything in this world is of a bluish hue. The sky is navy, in the middle of the day. The land is a dark blue, reflecting what little, silvery light there is. The atmosphere is calm and quiet; it feels like there is never much activity in this place. A long, winding path leads down the hill, and towards what appears to be a small village. Though distant, the party can just make out smoke coming from the chimneys of houses in the village.

There are shapes dotted along the path towards the village. They are each roughly the shape and size of a person. The party proceeds along the path to the village. When they are close enough to the first figure, Rosen realises what they are. They are souls; each one having left their body behind. Rosen speaks to one.

“Where is my body?” they ask.

“What does it look like?” asks Rosen, as if there is something she can do to help.

“I don’t know.”

“What is your name?”

“I don’t know. Where is my body?”

The conversation, what little of it there was, ends as the soul continues to wander the still land. Ikle walks through the soul; they take no notice.

Reaching the end of the path, the party arrive at the village. They can tell that the houses appear to be those of High Rock, but a some point, they have been turned into near ruins and rebuilt. Twig walks up to the door of the first house and knocks.

He is greeted by a man wielding a sword. Twig takes a sudden step back. “It’s alright,” the man says, “I can see that you’re not of this world”. He puts the sword away and gestures for the group to step inside, which they do, before the man quickly shuts the door; not before he has looked both ways, as if checking for anyone watching their interaction.

The man does not introduce himself, nor does he offer hospitality. Instead, he gets straight to telling the party about this world. “Our people were dragged here by vampires,” he says, excitedly, but in a hished tone, as though someone might be listening from the door. “Some escaped. The souls here are of people who were sacrifced to some dark religion. Oh, watch out for the husks. They are soulless people. You’ll have seen the souls on your way here; they’re harmless.”.

The party nod in agreement. Twig asks, “What about the blueness?”

“There don’t seem to be days, here,” replies the man, whose name the party still don’t know, despite having been guests in his house for some time. “Just the constant blueness. You get used to it.”.

“What do you eat?” asks Twig.

“The creatures here are edible, mostly.”. Ikle hugs Vinnie closely. “The plants, too; we know which ones we can eat. They’re usually the same ones that the creatures eat; we watch them. Oh, there’s the city, too. You’ll be wanting to visit. It’s that way,” he says, pointing in the opposite direction to that which the party used to get this far.

This explanation begins to make Twig uneasy. It’s starting to sound like the man expects the party to be staying in this world for some time, or even to take up residence here. “Where in Tamriel are you from?” he asks, casually, trying to learn more about the man’s story.

“Sharnhelm, High Rock.” the man replies.

“Aren’t you wary that you’ll end up like one of those wandering souls?” asks Ninzel, directly.

“No,” replies the man, succinctly. His sniffs the air, and a look of urgency fills his face. “My steamed hams!” he exclaims, as he runs into the small kitchen. The party all realise that they have outstayed their welcome, and make a discreet exit.

As suggested by the man, the party travel onwards to the city. Twig begins drawing a map, showing the route they have taken, in case they should have any difficulty finding the portal again. Before long, they enter a valley, and as the valley twists and turns, it is difficult to figure out the direction they are travelling in. Twig increasingly struggles to map where they are going, and his map becomes less accurate. At the bottom of the valley is a river, which the path hugs for much of its length. The river glows light blue. This fascinates Shroomie and John, who step right up to the river bank for a closer look. Shroomie touches the water; nothing unusual happens. John observes this, then takes his drinking cup and plunges it into the water. He takes a sip of the river water and then writes down some notes, commenting to the party that it tastes “bland”. As he speaks, everyone notices that his tongue has started to glow slightly with the colour of the river, but they don’t say anything and continue on their way.

Ikle is interested in the fish living in the river and manages to quickly catch a small fish in a jar. John observes the fish and makes notes. Vinnie, excited by the small fish, jumps into the river and pulls out a much bigger fish. Twig stays out of the water to protect his clothes, but instead picks up a discarded cardboard box, chuckling. He mimes, “big fish, little fish, cardboard box,” to varying degrees of amusement from the rest of the party.

As they continue walking through the valley towards the city, the party encounter husks standing, motionless, in the river. Remembering what the man in the house had told them, they are cautious of the husks, and hurry by quickly. Turning back to look at the husks, the party see that they are still motionless, and somewhat pensive. Perhaps the man had been overzealous in warning them. But best be cautious.

Not far from the end of the valley, Shroomie muses, “Perhaps I will have some luck finding the book thief here,” and he takes out some posters bearing the thief’s image. It looks nothing like any member of the party, but it looks particularly unlike Rosen, the actual book thief. The supposed thief in the image is dressed in bright orange clothes, matching their hair, which is seemingly on fire.

Ikle, stating the blindingly obvious, says “They don’t look like any of us.”. The slight admission in making this comment is lost on Shroomie. Moving onwards, the world around them becomes brighter. There is more here to remind the party of their own world; a few discarded man-made items and some familiar plants. As they make their final descent from the valley path, Ikle throws a bone for Vinnie. Ikle’s aim is poor, and the bone disappears over the side of the cliff. Vinnie runs for it regardless, and also disappears over the cliff. Ikle runs after Vinnie, but stops at the top of the cliff to see that Vinnie has fallen, but was uninjured and has already lifted himself up and started climbing back to Ikle, whose arms are outstretched for him.

The valley comes to an end, and the party find themselves standing on a massive plain, with the city gates clearly visible ahead. Vinnie enjoys playing in the glowing blue water of the river, which continues to the city. He chases and scares fish as he jumps and splashes in the water. Vinnie’s apparent intelligence, and childlike wonder, are not lost on those observing him.

Upon reaching the edge of the city, Shroomie moves himself to the head of the party and starts to climb the city gates. Much to his embarrassment, and to the rest of the party’s amusement, the gate magically opens of its own accord. Shroomie drops back to the ground.

“Let’s go to the pub,” announces Ikle, and the party stroll to the first tavern, which is visible from the city gates. The gates close behind them. Stepping into the pub, a few people look up with interest, but then turn back to their drinks. Clearly this isn’t a place where everyone knows everyone intimately, but the sight of someone unrecognised by at least a few other patrons would be unusual.

Ikle, Twig and Vinnie (through Ikle) order hot chocolate. John orders his usual pint of warm milk, gaining a look of disapproval from the bartender, but no comment. Once the party have their drinks, Ikle and Twig begin questioning the bartender on the history of this world, while John listens intently, at all times maintining eye contact with the bartender and drinking from his glass with a straw.

“Our ancestors came here about two millenia ago,” the bartender begins. “We made our home here, after leaving your world. We like life here. Far away from politics.”.

“But what about Malog Bal? Don’t you fear him?” asks Twig, curious and slightly puzzled.

“Not really. Sure, he’s about, and this is his realm, but Merida keeps us safe.”.

“Merida?” asks Ikle, having not heard the name before.

“Merida is the patron saint of the city,” says the bartender. “There’s a statue of her in the square outside. She’s a daedra, like Malog Bal. She lives in her own realm, but visits often to help us.”.

“Why does she do it?” asks Twig, curious.

“Malog Bal, of course. It bugs him that she makes this place inhabitable. He doesn’t like people in his realm.”.

The party finish their drinks and leave the tavern to investigate further. Just outside the tavern, they spot the statue of Merida. Vinnie, having drunk a lot of water in the tarvern, promptly cocks his leg against Merida’s foot and pees. A town guard hollers at the group and Vinnie runs back to Ikle. “Do not let your hound desecrate the statue of our beloved patron!” he shouts. Ikle thinks of arguing back, that Vinnie is not just a common hound, but think better of it. Shroomie leads the party hurriedly away to the church.

After quickly searching the interior of the church, Ikle leads the party down to the undercroft, in the hope of finding something interesting. There is nothing there to interest even a necromancer, and so, with disappointment, Ikle leads the party back to the statue. The town guard has left, giving Ikle the opportunity to examine the statue properly. They cast Identify on the statue, and Ikle learns of the magic of Merida. She feels that the magic may be key to understanding the nature of this realm, and leads the party to the city library.

Rosen, not confident of their ability to help in the research task, chooses to stay outside of the library. The town guard has returned, and becomes suspicious of Rosen loitering outside. Ikle steps in with Vinnie. “You’ve got one chance with that,” the receptionist snaps. Vinnie seems content.

“I suggest we divide and conquer,” says Twig, confidently. “Let’s each take a section of the library, and search for books about Merida and the history of this realm.”. Ikle and Shroomie do as Twig directs. John, who was already in the library, joins the search. Vinnie sits patiently.

Before long, the group reconvene with their findings. “Look what I found!” says Shrooomie, excitedly. He holds up a picture book, open on a page describing the city, with its walls rising out of the page. The rest of the group, but Twig especially, are not amused. Shroomie keeps smiling as he turns the pages, having apparently not noticed the reactions on the others’ faces. The thought quickly crosses Twig’s mind that, if he came across the book thief with the stolen book, how would he recognise it?

“Here’s a handwritten account of an early settler,” announces Twig, placing a large volume on the table. “I’ve not yet skimmed through all of it, but what I have read is very relevant.”.

Meanwhile, outside the library, the guard is growing increasingly suspcious at Rosen’s loitering. “Oi! What are you doing here?” he asks, in a firm tone.

“Nothing.” is the unsatisfactory reply.

“Then move along, please. No loitering after dark.” snaps the guard. The thought crosse Rosen’s mind that it had been nothing but dark since the group arrived here from the castle, but mentioning that would highlight Rosen’s lack of knowledge about this world and draw suspicion. Instead, she moves quietly into the inn that the party had visited earlier.

In the library, Ikle presents their volume to the assembled group. It is smaller than the one that Twig found, and, unlike Twig’s, has a beautiful colour etching on the cover. The title, in illuminated letters, is ‘The Clawfacer, the Warlock, and the Wardrobe’. It is clearly a work of fiction, and although its usefulness is unclear, a delightful tome.

Twig is unamused, but not as despairingly so as he was at Shroomie’s contribution. He begins reading from the handwritten account, paraphrasing in places to account for the group’s short attention span. “We travelled here when Malog Bal invaded our old world,” he begins. “Merida came here to help us establish our city. It has grown since then, and we have raised our children here and built other settlements.”.

Twig skips forward a few pages. “The Vestige is our hero. He was here at the beginning, with Merida,” Twig looks up. “These events appear to have taken place around two thousand years ago,” he says, thoughts straining his face. “Whatever we’re dealing with, it’s ancient.”.

The group are silent for a moment. “Is there any mention of vampires in the book?” asks Ikle, enthralled.

“None that I could find, and it’s something I was looking for,” replies Twig. “Maybe the account is too old.”. He looks down again at the volume, and leafs through to another page, which he has bookmarked. “Merida has her own realm; this is the realm of Malog Bal. Malog Bal is after the souls of humans. He takes them and leaves the bodies as husks.”.

“The husks; they’re what we saw standing in the river?” asks Shroomie.

“I would assume so,” adds Ikle.

“The book tells us that some, gifted people can open portals,” continues Twig, glad of the interruption as it showed the group keeping up their interest. “Though these portals are temporary. An anchor can keep a portal open.”.

“Like the castle?” asks Ikle.

“I would assume so, yes,” replies Twig. “That’s as much as I’ve discovered so far. John, did you find anything?”.

John, who’d been notably quiet until now, despite being in his natural habitat of the library, shakes his head disappointedly. He has not been able to find anything of interest.

Rosen is sat alone at a table in the tavern. The guard, who had taken such an interest in her earlier on, has now left, much to Rosen’s relief. The rest of the party walk into the tavern and join her. They start sharing the knowledge they gained from the library, over a round of drinks.

Twig updates his map of the land they have travelled so far; it is not very accurate because the party spent so long walking along the foot of the valley with little sense of where they were going. He was not able to find many resources to help him at the library; creating maps has apparently not been a priority for people living here, which strikes Twig as being unusual.

The group decide that their best course of action would be to try and make contact with either Malog Bal or Merida, though preferably the latter, as she is understood to be much more accommodating to the people here. Once the drinks are finished, Ikle, on a whim but with complete belief that their plan will work, leads the group outside. “Hello, Merida,” she says to the statue. Glances are exchanged between the other members of the party, but before they can be fully acknowledged, the statue springs into life.

“Hello, Ikle,” she says, in a kind but controlled voice. “I am Merida.” The group, except Ikle, are all taken aback at the statue’s announcement, though none are in the slightest bit afraid. “You are in Malog Bal’s realm,” she continues. “He is the most powerful being here. I just make the realm inhabitable for your sort.”

“Aha! I knew it!” shouts Ikle, grinning at the statue. “Knew it’d talk!” shouts Ikle, now grinning at the party. She turns back to the statue. “Now you’d better keep talking. We’ve come a long way to get to the bottom of this. Why do you make the realm inhabitable for people?”.

“Because it bugs him.” says Merida, a wry smile forming on her bronze face. Twig shrugs his shoulders, as though he can relate to this. “There is an outpost, where vampires have been sacrificing your people,” Merida continues. She points into the distance. Twig records the direction of her finger against the landscape as a line on his increasingly inaccurate map.

“We will venture there and destroy the vampires,” says Ikle, raising her fist.

“As you will,” says the statue of Merida, her bronze form reverting once more to stillness, leaving the party to ponder their next move.

2023-01-10

The statue’s words have filled the party with enthusiasm. Ikle faces her fellow adventurers and says “We’ll go in that direction,” pointing as the statue did.

“I’ll navigate,” volunteers Twig, still holding his map. As they stroll towards the edge of the town, the party are greeted by a commotion in the streets outside of the Natural History Museum.

Ikle suggests that the party break their journey out of the city in order to investigate the commotion at the museum. They walk up to the front desk, which is manned by an old man. Gold-rimmed spectacles hang from a chain around his neck, as he stares blankly into space. He sits up slowly. “Can I help you?”.

“Good day,” starts Ninzel, “Do you make any concessions?”

“The museum is free to enter,” is the old man’s reply.

“Ah, lovely. Are there any temporary exhibits we should see?” continues Ninzel.

“Temporary exhibits? The whole place is temporary, in a manner of speaking,” replies the old man, his attention drifting away from the party and back to staring into space.

“The museum is being burned down that soon?” asks Twig, referring to the loud protest outside, but with just the slightest hint of excitement in his voice. The receptionist, unaware of Twig’s history of burning down buildings, ignores the question.

Ikle rudely asks, “Do you get paid for working here?”

“No, my master told me to do it,” is the receptionist’s reply, with only half of his attention in the room and the other half elsewhere. It is clear that the group will not gain anything useful by continuing their conversation with the receptionist.

“Just pick a door,” says Ninzel, exasperated. “Any door.” The group walk past the front desk and take the door on their left. They find themselves in the museum library. Immediately, Ninzel’s attention is drawn to a number of volumes locked inside a glass case. Scanning the titles, it appears that most of the books are about cheese. Some of them, concerningly, carry specks of blood on the spines.

Despite there being hundreds of other books available to read, Ninzel is still keen to investigate those ones locked away in the glass case. Twig lifts them up to the case, to enable them to break the glass and remove the volumes. The books are also out of reach for Ikle, who gestures for Vinnie to fetch one of them. Vinnie completely misunderstands the instruction, and sits on the floor licking his eyeballs.

In an instant, the books in the case become animated and fly out of the case. Ninzel reacts quickly, attacking the first of the books with their rapier. Twig reacts next, casting Burning Hands on the entire group of books, at the same time singing some of the stationary, innocent books on the other shelves. Vinnie also rushes forward to attack some of the moving books, finding it an act of entertainment, rather than the fight that the rest of the party are now fully engaged in.

Rosen is critically hit twice by the rogue books. Ninzel, attacking them at all angles with their rapier, shouts “Stab!” The books start cackling. Ikle goes for the loudest one, while Ninzel completely misses their target, but still manages to skewer another book.

Shroomie’s attack also misses its mark, and he burns himself on one of the books that was earlier set alight by Twig. One of the books starts laughing and taunting Ikle for missing it with their quarterstaff. Ninzel vows revenge at the book, and Ikle knocks it perfectly into the centre of the room with a well-positioned strike of their quarterstaff.

The receptionist enters just as the party finish off the last of the animated books. The room is in chaos. Some books have been destroyed, some are still burning, and many have been strewn across the floor. The room is a complete mess, and without intervention, will soon cease to be a room entirely. The receptionist enters, takes a brief look at the party, sighs, and turns on the sprinklers. He acts as though what has just happened is a common occurrence, even though there is nothing common about it. Rather than asking the group to leave, or calling the authorities, the receptionist appears completely indifferent, and even somewhat bored. He leaves the library and returns, without a word or emotion, to the front desk.

Not wanting to return the way they came, the group choose the other exit from the room. They attempt to open the wooden door, but find it locked. Twig, not satisfied with the damage he has already caused, makes the rash decision to burn down the door. He casts Burning Hands again on the door, which fails to burn as quickly as he would like. Ikle gives the door a solid blow with their quarterstaff, which knocks the bulk of the door from its hinges.

Stepping carefully over the burning embers of the former door, the party find themselves in an office. The plaque on the desk betrays the knowledge that the user of the office is the head of the museum. Ninzel begins to search for keys that might lead the group on to further locked rooms without causing quite so much chaos. The rest of the party compose a letter, dictated to Twig, who records it in his elegant cursive.

Dear Prince of Chaos,

Do you know where these vampires are? What’s up with this place? What’s up with you? Sorry for destroying your mimics, but they were very annoying. We tore them limb from cover and burned them. We are adventurers slash bounty hunters (unpaid) looking for vampires. By the way, Shroomie says, do you know anything about the book thief? Rosen especially liked killing the one that was laughing in their face.

Yours Lovingly,

Twig, Ninzel, Ikle, Shroomie, Rosen.

The letter is addressed to Sheogorath, Prince of Darkness, sealed, and placed in the out tray on the museum curator’s desk. It disappears, by magic, to be delivered to the royal addressee. Twig takes the in tray from the curator’s desk and carries it with him to easily receive any reply, assuming that it will arrive magically in the same way.

The group retrace their steps, through the fire damaged and now water damaged library, past the end of the reception hall, and into the cafeteria. The room is full of cheese, some of it worth eating. Vinnie rushes into the adjacent kitchen and searches it with his nose, finding more, tastier varieties of cheese.

Shroomie, having little interest in the cheese on offer in the cafeteria and the kitchen, and forgetting that Ninzel is carrying keys to many doors in the museum, kicks through a door into the courtyard. A fountain stands at the centre of the courtyard, and the party stop to make wishes. Ikle makes a wish, whispering to keep the wish a secret from the rest of the group so that it may come true, “Please make Vinnie grow big and strong.”

Twig, not believing that the confidentiality of his wish will have any bearing on whether it comes true or not, announces “I wish for luck in our fight against the vampires.”

Re-entering the building, the party find themselves navigating a series of galleries on wars, starting with the civil war, and then going back in time to wars of the ancients. Shroomie, captivated by some of the exhibits and their places in history, announces “I enjoy reading about history in books,” leaving the rest of the party in a stunned silence.

2023-01-24

Beginning in the room of the museum dedicated to the civil war, Ikle suggests a thorough investigation. They come across a painting that looks suspiciously like John, though whatever part he could have had in the civil war is a mystery, so the likeness must be a coincidence. The inbox makes a sound, indicating a reply from Sheogorath.

Dear Mortals,

I see my assistant Haskil has been lacking on security iin his office, I’ll need to have a talk with him. As for vampires, I do not deal in such things, however rumours around the Shivering Isles say that they are making Dark Anchors in the Black Forge to attempt the Great Meld again; that, or they are having a family barbecue, I don’t know which is true. Regarding the mimics; while you may destroy their bodies, their spirits will return back to me in oblivion. If you ash Shalidor about a book thief, he’d say me. But I won them fair. Maybe you should look close, they may be near. Or they may be far away.

Lots of Love,

Sheogorath.

The Daedric Prince’s sigil in ink at the bottom of the page marks the end of the ethereal communique.

“We didn’t take the other box,” exclaims Twig, knowing that without the other box, sending a reply is impossible.

“We need to go there!” says Ikle, with some enthusiasm. “Or go to the barbecue, either way.” Ikle leads the party through the next door, which will loop around to the office where they collected the first box.

This room is full of much older artefacts, and represents the finest items in the museum’s collection. Among them, an elven bowl, with a fork at its side, an example of early elven dinnerware. Shroomie admires the bowl intently, keeping a modest distance from it as though through fear. Then, gingerly, he reaches out a hand and touches the bowl; the slightest tip of his finger at first, then two fingers, then he puts his whole hand into the bowl. Nothing happens. Shroomie’s heart has quickened, and he can feel sparks flying up and down his spine at what he has just witnessed. The rest of the party notice nothing. Shroomie takes the fork and puts it in his pocket, in case it might come in handy.

Ikle has found a dinosuar skeleton. She tries to animate it using a spell; an ambitious objective, but one which she takes in her stride. The dinosuar comes to life, pushing her to the floor as it takes in its unfamiliar surroundings. Ninzel throws a rubber band at the dinosaur, which it ignores. A real dinosaur would, of course, run after a ball thrown for it to fetch. Ninzel instantly concludes that this dinosaur skeleton is not what it appears to be; it is actually another mimic. Vinnie chases after the rubber band ball instead, and through this action manages to stay out of trouble.

Two minotaurs, also presumably mimics, animate. Ikle asks politely if they “Wouldn’t mind stepping aside.” The minotaurs laugh at this request. Twig, seeing that combat is imminent, takes initiative and casts Ray of Frost at the minotaur which he has the clearest view of.

He runs across to the other side of the room, shouting “Lads, lads, over here!” One of the minotaurs, confused by Twig’s sudden movement, hits the dinosaur, sending it crashing to the ground and nearly stopping it in its tracks. Shroomie jumps onto the incapacitated dinosaur and does a quick dance on the bones, until it stands up and flings Shroomie to one side. Twig, in the corner of the room, sees that his plan to unite the party and then cast an area effect spell on the mimics is looking difficult to achieve.

Shroomie, now making his own attack, is disoriented by having been flung off of the dinosaur’s back, and he hits ninzel instead. Twig and Ikle continue to target the dinosaur and the minotaurs with cantrips, reducing all three of them to harmless dust.

On the way out of the room, Ikle loots some bones, though not ones from the dinosaur mimic’s corpse. Looking out from the balcony, the party can see that the angry mob outside is still there, much the same in number and formation as when the group entered the museum.

Finally out of the gallery and in the courtyard, the party recognise the statue of Sheogorath, the daedric prince with whom they have been in lively correspondence. Ikle sketches the statue for their notes. Shroomie walks close to the statue. Spurred on by his valiant victory over the fork by the elven bowl, he stands close enough to touch the statue, which towers above him. As he reaches out to place a hand on Sheogorath’s foot, the statue gives way, and falls onto him. Thinking quickly, which in itself takes everyone by surprise, Shroomie takes a few steps backwards, catches the statue as it falls, and with a quick, strong push, he launches the statue back up into its original position. For the second time today, Shroomie’s antics leave the rest of the party speechless.

The party exit silently through the gift shop. Ninzel stops on the way to buy a magnet for a fridge that they likely do not own. Twig picks up some ink and a pen for the chronicle. The receptionist offers complimentary eggs on the way out, which Tom reaches to accept, before a stern look from Rosen tells him not to. The group double back to Haskil’s office, where they pick up the outbox, enabling reliable two-way communication with the daedric prince. Twig writes as the rest of the group work together to dictate.

Dear Sheogorath,

Thank you for your letter. We agree that security at the museum is rather lax, and that you should have a ‘talk’ with Haskil. The statues are not idiot-proof. They almost killed our little one (idiot). Rosen, Ikle and Vinnie (Ikle’s pet dragon-thing) liked their souvenirs. I hope you don’t mind hearing about our adventure, because oh boy, we have your box.

Love and kisses,

Lads, lads, lads.

Upon placing the letter in the outbox, it vanishes like before. Upon leaving the museum, it too disappears, leaving a green park in its place. The angry mob outside dispel, now having nothing to be angry about, and the party barely take any notice of the mueseum’s sudden change of state from extant to not, it not being the most extraordinary thing they’ve seen today.

Walking away from the museum, Ikle is relieved and refreshed by the day’s events, and begins to tell the rest of the party how they came to be here. “I was apprenticed to a blacksmith back home,” she begins. “But I felt that the work of wizards was my true calling. I practiced evocation.”

Twig let out a small groan at this, but it was not enough for Ikle to pause her tale. “It was useful, for lighting fires, keeping the steel and the water hot. Until one day, I was messing about with a friend, and, and,” Ikle takes a moment to compose herself, “And I burned down the smithy. My friend’s brother was still inside. They both worked there too. He didn’t get out.”

The party are silenced. Twig feels a lump in his throat, ashamed of this thoughts of Ikle as an amateur evocationist.

“I studied necromancy as a means to bring him back. But I never could. I dug up his body, tried to revive him, but, his spirit was too far gone. His remains became an animated corpse. Like any creature I can animate.” She pauses again. From her eloquence, it would seem that she has told this story before, but only a handful of times, perhaps just once. Nonetheless, her face is holding back tears, and the rest of the party put aside for a moment the shocking tale they have just heard in order to comfort Ikle.

Some time passes, before the party collects themselves and moves on.

Sikle’s Backstory

In her youth, Sikle was interested in showy magic. She was apprenticed to a blacksmith, and was dedicated to learning his trade, but the ways of magic were always a distraction to her.

The Evocation magic she practiced was useful during her apprenticeship. She used fire magic for small tasks around the forge, such as lighting fires and keeping the steel and water hot.

One fateful day, Sikle became careless whilst messing around with a friend, and set fire to the forge. The place burned down, killing the friend’s brother. Sikle received the full blame for this, and her friend never spoke to her again.

Losing the apprenticeship at the forge, Sikle styled herself as Ikle and devoted herself entirely to her magic. She studied Necromancy in a vain effort to bring the friend’s brother back. It was too late. She dug up the friend’s body and tried to revive him, but his spirit was gone and the best should could do was to animate the corpse.

Ikle left the corpse and her friend behind, giving up on forgiveness, ashamed that she had now desecrated her friend’s brother’s grave, and moved on to begin a life of Necromancy elsewhere.

2023-02-07

Sheogorath, despite his exciting new correspondence channel, is bored. He materialises before his new penpals, conjuring smoke for dramatic effect. Once enough of it has cleared that the party can see him clearly (Sheogorath, as a daedric prince, has superior eyesight), he notices them. “Do you want to hear a story?” he asks. Without waiting for an answer from the tunned group assembled before him, he conjures a portal and walks through it, gesturing for the party to do the same.

As each of the party step through the portal, they feel themselves change. They grow bigger, or smaller, their features change, as they shift into different people. Except Shroomie, who, when he realises that, apart from Sheogorath, he is the only one unchanged by the experience, comments “There wouldn’t be enough main characters without me.”

Sheogorath disappears; rather than telling the group a story, he has left them in the middle of one. The party realise that they are in a town in Daggerfall, close to their familiar territory of High Rock. The first thing they notice is a dog sniffing around in some rubbish by the side of the street. As the dog does so, it dislodges a scroll, which, from the outside at least, appears to have no business in being thrown away. Lyle takes it, causing the dog to bark quickly at its rummaging being disrupted before running away.

Lyle unrolls the scroll. They are quite disappointed to see that it is merely a shopping list, arranged in order of the shops that the writer intended to visit;

Grocer, blood oranges

Tailor, cloak (crescent emblem)

Florist, black roses (with thorns)

Disappointed, and about to throw the scroll back into the rubbish, Lyle spots something in the rubbish that was likely the reason for the dog to be sniffing about. Just beneath where the scroll had been, a hand falls out from the pile into the street. Unfazed, Phillipe pulls the body out from under the rubbish. It did not belong to anyone known to the party. A quick examination reveals that it has been stabbed through the heart, and this is probably why the body appears content to be left in a pile of rubbish when most would be complaining.

The mystery thickens when Lyle searches the body and finds a letter. It is addressed to ‘Mr Normal Guy’, or ‘Joe Normhow’. Lyle takes the letter, but Shroomie quickly threatens to take it from them; “Give me that letter,” he says, grabbing the edge by the tips of his fingers. “Give it, or you’ll rip it in half!”

Deciding that the best plan forward is to alert the authorities to the presence of the dead body, without alerting the general public, they hide the body again in the pile of rubbish and leave the scene to find help. Wandering not too far down the street, they encounter a member of the city guard, and explain the situation. “We found a dead body in a pile of rubbish, after we noticed a dog attracted to it,” says Phillipe, eloquently.

The guard remains perfectly calm at this news, as though the discovery of dead bodies is a regular occurence in Daggerfall, and that the mere mention of it was bordering on overreaction.

“Well, I can’t help you with that,” he replies. “But if you insist on doing something, request help from the investigation team.”

“And where would we find the investigation team?” asks Phillipe, becoming annoyed at the guard’s dispassion in the situation.

“In the guard house, end of the street,” replies the guard, pointing. He is becoming equally annoyed at the strange group wasting his time.

Glad too be out of the tiresome conversion, the group are led by Lyle to the guard house. Lyle has visited Daggerfll before on holiday. Given what the rest of the group have seen of Daggerfall so far, Lyle wishes that they’d kept this fact quiet.

Little has changed in the city since Lyle’s holiday, so the guard house is easy to find. Phillipe, the most eloquent of the group and the best prepared to talk about the dead body, leads. “Good afternoon,” Phillipe begins, on the premise that good manners cost nothing and might actually have an impact on someone who works behind a desk, “We would like to talk to the investigation team about the discovery of a dead body.”

The man behind the desk looks blankly back at Phillipe for a moment. “Do you have an investigation reference?”

Stunned, again, at the lack of passion, but keeping his composure, Phillipe says, dryly, “No, I do not have an investigation number.”

Any emotion which Phillipe let slip into his voice is completely lost on the man behind the desk, who simply hands Phillipe a form, saying “We will open a new one. Please fill out this form.”

Phillipe considers arguing at the desk man’s lack of concern, but really just wants to be away from him, so takes up a position at a standing desk and fills out the form with a ballpoint pen attached to the desk by a chain.

Getting the impression that it will be a long time before the slow wheels of bureaucracy begin to turn, Phillipe asks Lyle to lead the group to the market. “We may as well finish the dead guy’s shopping,” he says, once out of the guard house.

The party descend upon the city’s shopping quarter. First on their list of items is a crescent moon cloak. They dive into the first tailor’s shop they see, ‘Winsome Loom’. Phillipe opens the door and a bell above it chimes. Shroomie is the last one through, and fascinated by the bell, opens and closes the door several more times until Lyle stops him. The tailor, an elderly man with a full head of grey hair, dressed in a fancy but slightly grubby formal suit with frock coat and cravatte, descends the narrow staircase a little too quickly. He nearly falls, but steadies himself on the banister. “What is the matter? Oh, I don’t recognise your faces, what brings you here with,” he looks at Shroomie, “Such excitement?”

“We’re looking for clothes with a crescent moon emblem,” asks Clara, politely, “Would you happen to sell those here?”

“A crescent moon?” replies the tailor. “That’s the crest of the royal family of the town, I would only provide such items by commission.”

“Then who was the last person to commission such an item from you?” asks Lyle, forwardly.

“Oh, let’s see,” replies the tailor, casting his mind back. “Not so long ago, yes, there was a gentleman who required a piece for the merchant’s guild, it was a cloak with the crescent emblem you describe.”

“A cloak? How interesting,” says Clara, confident that this is the cloak from the shopping list.

“Oh yes, quite the fashionable item,” says the tailor, pleased that this stranger is taking an interest in his work. “I was quite pleased with the matching silk underpants that I made to order to go with the cloak, the crescent emblem fitted quite well around the…”

He is cut off by Lyle, “Thank you, but we really must be going.”

Back outside, in the bustling marketplace, Lyle is the first to spot a stall selling predominantly oranges. He walks up to the vendor, whom Phillipe is looking from side to side, nervously. Before Phillipe is able to use his tact to stop the vendor becoming any more unnerved, Lyle walks up to the stall and asks directly for “Three blood oranges, please.”

The vendor glares at Lyle, taking a small step back as he does so. “Oh? Three blood oranges? Anything else?” His lips are visibly trembling.

“No, thank you, three blood oranges,” requests Lyle, stressing the last three words.

The already nervous vendor is almost tearful with fear. “I knew this would happen,” he whimpers. “You’re a spy, aren’t you?” He raises his voice, so that everyone in the marketplace can hear. “He’s a spy!” Heads turn at the scene which is unfolding, but nobody takes any action.

Lyle tries to console the man, “No, no I’m not a spy,” he says, beginning to panic himself in the confusion. Phillipe stands behind Lyle, head in his hands in response to the scene unfolding before him.

A member of the marketplace crowd says quietly to Phillipe, “Don’t worry, he’s always like this,” referring to the orange vendor. “Nay a week goes by without a tirade of this sort. Poor Guy.” The vendor grabs Lyle by his coat lapels, lifting him his own height off of the ground in the process. Clara puts her hand on her weapon, ready to draw it if required. Phillipe does not, because he can see that the vendor poses no real threat.

“Then explain how it is that you know the code,” says the vendor to Lyle, so that only he can hear.

“It’s not mine, it’s from a dead man.”

The vendor releases his grip on Lyle. “Roy? Roy Roy is dead? How did that happen?”

“We don’t know,” interrupts Phillipe. “And, with the efficiency of the constabulary in this town, it is doubtful that any of us will know for some time.”

Giving their assurances to the orange vendor that, should there be any developments with regards to finding Roy Roy’s killer, they would let him know, the group depart to continue their search.

At the florist’s stall, Phillipe takes the lead, trying to avoid a spectacle such as the one Lyle caused. “Good day. Tell me, squire, do you have any black roses for sale?” Phillipe flashes a smile. “The type with thorns?”

The vendor is not startled, like the orange vendor, but gestures Phillipe to draw closer so that they can speak without being overheard. “Yes, I have what you’re looking for, friend.” The vendor clasps Phillipe’s hand. “I am sorry for your loss.” Phillipe tries hard not to let his emotions, joint confusion and excitement, show. “I spoke to Roy often about dark nature magic. He spoke to Captain Aresin, of the castle guard, on the same topic. Someone wielding dark nature magic has their sights on killing King Casimire.”

Phillipe nods, careful to remember every word of the conversation. “Please tell me more about dark nature magic.”

“Information is cheaper now than it was then. Go to the Rosey Lion Inn, find Grenna. She will tell you what you need to know.”

The florist presses a single flower into Phillipe’s hand. It does not appear to be of any significance, other than as a friendly token. Phillipe puts the flower in his buttonhole.

It is well into the afternoon as the group, led again by Lyle as the regional expert, enter The Rosey Lion. It is a lively establishment. A large group, mostly sitting but some standing, are making some noise over in one corner, clearly a little tipsy at this early stage of the afternoon. Lyle walks to the bar and asks, “We’re looking for Grenna, where might we find her?”

The bartender replies, “If you bought a drink, you’d find her by the fireplace.”

Phillipe takes the hint and orders warm mead for himself and Lyle, and corn for Clara and Shroomie, before they take their seats by the fireplace. The bartender brings over a bottle of mead.

Phillipe introduces the party. “Grenna? We’re friends of Roy.”

“Friends of Roy,” Grenna repeats, looking lowly up at the group from her position close to the fire. She is an elderly, slightly built woman. As the firelight illuminates her eyes, the group can only imagine the experiences that she has had, the things she has seen. “You have come to the right place. And at the right time. Go up those stairs there; the Viper League are meeting.” With that, she turns back to looking at the fire, and starts singing gently; so quietly that Phillipe cannot make out the words.

Not wanting to disturb Grenna any further, for thinking that doing so would not lead anywhere, the group head upstairs. As they reach the landing, they hear a loud voice come from the close door, “Oh no help me! They’ve found me!”

Lyle knocks. A voice from just behind the door comes through the keyhole, “Shh!”

Lyle is confused at this. “Do you want us to shush? Or someone inside?” There is no response.

Not waiting a moment longer, Shroomie takes a run at the door in order to ram it down. At that moment, whoever had whispered “Shh!” at Lyle unlocks and opens the door. Shroomie rams the open doorframe, losing his balance, but then regaining it and sticking the landing. The rest of the party rush in behind him.

“Put that weapon down or so help me!” shouts Lyle. This doesn’t work. One man is holding a knife to the throat of another, who is sat whimpering on the floor. The man holding the knife barely acknowledges Lyle’s presence.

Shroomie throws an axe at the man with the knife. He drops it. Lyle quickly swipes it from the floor.

The man who was holding the knife instead takes a vial of potion from his pocket and tries to drink it. Lyle runs and slaps the potion out of his hand; it spills onto the floor, quickly burning a hole through the wooden floorboard. Lyle casts Entangled, holding the man against the nearest wall. He remains mute, not giving away any information.

Clara sits on the floor, next to the whimpering man. It takes a moment for him to regain his composure. “You’re safe, now. What’s your name?”

“Steven. Leveque,” replies the man, slowly. “I don’t know who he is,” gesturing to the man against the wall, “But he meant to kill me.”

Shroomie, at Lyle’s instruction, covers the ears of the man held against the wall by Lyle’s spell, so that he cannot hear any more details.

“Martinge Lerineauc hired me, as a mason, to map out the tunnels under Daggerfall, many of which I helped to build.”

At that moment, midspeech, two arrows fly through the open window. One fails to meet with anyone in the room and sticks into the plaster wall. Shroomie aims to snatch the second one out of the air. He fails, the arrow just grazing his cheek, and instead it meets with the head of the assassin, who is still held tight against the wall. Everyone in the room sees this, and ducks to the floor. Lyle, realising that to make an accurate shot from that angle, the ranger must be on the same floor in a building across the street, moves as quickly as he can across the floor before standing up outside of the room and rushing down the stairs. The rest of the party follow him.

2023-02-28

Upon stepping through Sheogorath’s portal, Leon landed not in the town with the rest of the party, but just outside. He assessed the situation and quickly decided that the logical action would be to walk into the town and search for his companions. He wandered the streets of the town for hours without finding any trace of them, before deciding that what he actually wanted to do was sit in a tavern with a pint of beer, and so this is what he has been doing for the past several hours while the rest of the party were searching for clues and fighting outlaws.

The party rush downstairs and bump into Leon at the bar. “We’ve got to go!” shouts Lyle upon seeing Leon.

Leon leaves his pint at the bar to rejoin the group as they exit the pub.

Lyle judges the angle at which the arrow must have been fired to make it through the upstairs window of the tavern, and deduces that it came from the building opposite. He tries the door and finds it locked. Shroomie, acting quickly, uses a drainpipe to scurry up to the open window on the first floor and swing into the room. Clara and Leon both follow his example and shimmy up the wall.

Lyle and Philippe both fail to climb up the wall. Lyle shouts to Shroomie, “Lift!” and Shroomie lifts Philippe up into the room. Philippe then goes downstairs to open the door from the inside, permitting Lyle entry.

All of the party are together in the room. The ranger who fatally shot the assassin has long since fled. There are several trunks in the room. Shroomie, thinking he is being comedic, gravitates towards one containing luxurious silk underwear. He waves it about to elicit laughter from the party, however, Philippe notices immediately the crescent emblem expertly sewn into the fancy pants and takes them from Shroomie.

“These are the underpants mentioned by the tailer, indeed, the emblem and the the quality are matching his description.” As Philippe caresses the exquisite fabric, a note falls out of the pants and onto the floor. Philippe is too distracted by the fancy pants to notice, and Lyle picks up the note.

“The assassins will be hiding in crates on the cargo ship as planned,” says Lyle, reading the note. Philippe gathers the silk underwear, folding it and placing it delicately in his embroidered satchel.

The party leave th house and head to the docks, in order to apprehend the assassins mentioned in the note. Lyle and Clara already know the city, but Leon begins constructing a mental map, and announces that he is doing this to his companions. Clara leads. The time is roughly midday, and the Sun is high in the sky.

Leon locates the harbour office, and suggests that the party seek answers there. They walk in, the five of them crowding the harbourmaster’s small office. “I are here on the authority of Captain Aresin,” says Leon, with such confidence that the harbourmaster barely glances up at him to verify his status.

“Captain who?” asks the harbourmaster, with more concern for getting this irritating group out of his office than anything else.

“Captain Aresin of the town guard,” replies Leon, with just the right amount of irritation present in his voice for the harbourmaster to take his request serious, without becoming suspicious.

“Whatever,” says the harbourmaster, mumbling “I don’t get paid enough for this.”

“I require information. Which of these ships are owned by Martin Leveque, and when are they scheduled to depart?”

The harbourmaster reluctantly puts down his pen and moves to a large ledger on an adjacent desk. “Hotspur, says here. And Lydia. Those are your two, both scheduled to depart this evening,” he says, hoping that this will be enough to satisfy the supposed agent of the town guard.

It is not. “I require the cargo manifest for each ship,” demands Leon, with his tone of authority.

The harbourmaster huffs and reaches to a chest of drawers, pulling out two sheets of paper from a file contained within. “Here you go. I’ll be wanting them back.”

Much to the harbourmaster’s relief, the group file back out of his office. They split, Lyle, Clara and Philippe investigating Lydia, and Shroomie and Leon investigating Hotspur. Leon explains the arrangement, “I only need one of you to assist me, the rest of you should form a group of three.”

Philippe is enthusiastic about the investigation of the ship ‘Lydia’, until he climbs his first ladder and realises that “I am a courtier, my hands are too dainty for ship life.” The group of three make it to Lydia’s cargo hold. They hear a shuffling sound coming from one of the boxes, but they can’t tell which one it is. Clara opens up the nearest crate.

She lifts out several bolts of fine fabric. These pique Philippe’s interest; “Then again,” he says, taking the bolts within his giant, minotaur hands, “Ship life might have its appeal.”

Lyle grows impatient. Aware of the presence of a stowaway in this room, he starts shouting “I’ll set the fabrics on fire,” to try to get the stowaway to show their face. “I will!” This doesn’t work; everything is quiet in the cargo hold, the shuffling coming from the crates has stopped. It is so quiet, that everyone in the room can hear Philippe take pleasure in running his fingers over a delicate silk bolt.

Aware that his plan to intimidate the stowaway has failed, Lyle concocts a new solution. He takes his scimitar and begins to slice through the gaps in the wooden crates, describing his actions loudly as he does so. The stowaway, aware of the immediate danger he is in, panics and falls out of the box in which he was hiding. Lyle, brandishing his scimitar, walks up to the stowaway, and with a few swift movements, uses a length of rope to tie him up.

Leon and Shroomie use the gangplank to climb aboard Hotspur. In his eagerness to get on board and complete their task, Leon is clumsy and makes a noise by rocking the gangplank. Fortunately, nobody is about at this time to hear, and the two board Hotspur unnoticed. From the main deck, Leon locates a ladder, which takes the pair down to the cargo hold, via that ship’s living accommodation.

A half-awake voice from the living accommodation protests “Get out of here, rat!”

“I’m not a rat, I’m a dwarf!” shouts Shroomie, in reply, inadvertedly announcing his presence. Fortunately, and to Leon’s surprise, the voice either chooses not to pursue the dwarf, or falls asleep, content in the knowledge that Shroomie is not a rat.

Upon entering the cargo hold, Shroomie begins knocking on crates. A shuffling noise comes from one of them, as if in reply. He opens the crate, and discovers, to his surprise, a man inside eating a banana. Accepting that he has been caught, with both Leon and Shroomie peering down at him from the top of the crate, the second assassin is open to a dialogue.

“What’s your job here?” asks Shroomie. Leon is not sure whether Shroomie is asking the man about his occupation as an assassin, or the specific task to which he has been assigned.

The assassin assumes that Shroomie is asking about the latter, and replies, “To wait here until it is time.”

“And what is the time?” asks Leon, eager to regain some illusion of competence in front of the man whom they have just apprehended.

“It’s just after midday, but that’s not important right now,” replies Shroomie. Leon places his face in his palm.

A voice from outside breaks the embarrassment which Leon feels for Shroomie. “I’ve left my fishing rod, it’s been stolen!”

The assassin, turning back to Leon, answers the question, “Until we’re near the cave, just outside of the port.”

“You’re not part of the crew, I take it?” asks Leon.

“No. I work for the Bloodthorn gang,” says the assassin, his compliance surprising to Leon.

Shroomie and Leon escort the assassin off Hotspur, passing the living accommodation, this time not attracting the attention of the half-awake, or possible by now asleep, voice. They meet Clara, Lyle and Philippe, who have disembarked from Lydia, their assassin in tow. Leon directs the party to a shady alley jsut away from the main harbour. Although the harbour is not well populated at this hour, moving to the alleyway ensures that the group will not be observed.

On their way to the alley, however, the group are apprehended by a stranger. Everyone is startled. The stranger asks, “Have you seen my fishing rod?” Realising that the stranger is no threat to them, they make their excuses and move on.

In the alleyway, Leon is quick to kick the tied prisoner, from Lydia, to the floor. He grabs the prisoner’s hair and pulls it back sharply, angling his head towards the other prisoner, who is being held tightly by Shroomie. “Do you know this man?” he asks.

“Yes, he’s my partner,” comes the strained reply. Philippe’s ears prick up. “My partner in crime.” Philippe’s ears prick back down again.

“Which one of you fired the arrow?” demands Leon, louder, and with carefully measured anger in his voice.

“Neither of us,” replies the assassin whose hair Leon is grasping.

Leon pushes the man’s head away. He backs off, creating distance between himself and Leon, who has quickly become a fearsome figure.

Satisfied both that the assassins’ plans have been foiled, and that there is nothing more to learn from them, the group let them go before boarding Hotspur, Leon and Shroomie for the second time, seeking to work their passage to her destination.

2023-03-14

Leon asks, “Has anyone sailed a ship before?” as Hotspur departs. The crew are moving in all directions across the deck, while the party do their best to stay out of the way. “Obviously not Philippe, with those hands,” jests Leon. Philippe blushes slightly, and tries to hide it, causing him to blush more.

Once the activity has calmed, Leon asks the crew for duties. “The captain isn’t that bothered about you lot working,” is the reply, and so the party settle into ship life fairly rapidly. Lyle takes it upon himself to climb to the crow’s nest, and from there keep a look out for the cave mentioned by the assassin.

The rest of the party retire to the mess room, where they find fresh oranges, and an array of preserved foods to eat. Leon gets chatting to the crew about their captain; the overwhelming impression he gets from the crew is that the captain is easy going and treats the crew well.

Clara is less content with the provisions aboard Hotspur. She asks the crew, “Do you have any fresh food?”

The permanent crew laugh at her, and make fun by throwing a fish in her direction. Before the crew have time to tease Clara further, Lyle enters the room. “There are dark clouds around us!” he exclaims to everyone. Some of the crew and Leon go to the bridge.

The crew are looking over one side of the ship, some of them shouting in perfect unison, which impresses Philippe, “Thar she blows!” A whale has surfaced alongside Hotspur. The whale sprays water across everyone standing on the deck, including Clara. The crew laugh, and from nowhere, produce another fish to throw at her.

All the while that the crew are studying the whale and teasing Clara, the dark clouds move closer. The captain, whom the crew have not seen until now, takes control of the situation and guides Hotspur towards a safe island port. The crew rush around, as they did when Hotspur departed, setting sails to take Hotspur to the safe port. Lyle, not knowing how he can help, starts fishing over the side of Hotspur. Clara shoots him a look, in case he’s sourcing more fish to throw at her.

Philippe begins playing the saxophone in a sea shanty fashion. The noise he makes is not recognisable as a sea shanty and the crew ignore it, however, his cacophonous tones do attract a sea siren. The siren grabs Philippe’s hand and tries to drag him below; however, Philippe’s strength, both mental and physical, is greater than that of the Siren, and he resists her grasp.

Lightning strikes the crow’s nest. It falls from the top of the main mast to the deck, not causing injury to anyone, but causing severe damage to Hotspur. The sails were set well, and it is not long before Hotspur arrives at the sheltered port. The entire party and most of the crew disembark quickly and make their way to a busy tavern built just above the port wall.

Leon walks confidently up to the bar and orders “A pint of mild, please,” even though he does not prefer any one drink over another and is just attempting to blend in.

Philippe walks up to the bar and asks, with more confidence than Leon, “What is your finest wine?” The bartender looks at him closely, and assuming he is speaking a peculiar dialect of Common, pulls him a pint of mild.

The party all take rooms at the pub. Unfamiliar with the concept of money, let alone the currency used on this island, they think it best to share rooms to save on funds. Lyle and Clara share one room and Leon and Philippe share a second. In the night, anyone unforunate enough to be standing near the door to Leon and Philippe’s room for a period of time would have heard a loud, rhythmic noise for a duration of precisely thirty minutes, followed by a short break, followed by another forty-five minutes. Whatever went on, as well as the precise nature of the timings, shall forever remain a mystery.

The following morning, Leon leaves its and Philippe’s room wearing Philippe’s shirt, and joins Clara and Lyle for breakfast. Neither of them comment on the shirt or the rhythmic noises, but instead Lyle is compaining of Clara’s loud snoring. “We slept rather well, actually,” says Leon. Neither Lyle or Clara ask as to why.

The party manage to settle up for the rooms, much to all their surprise, as they still have no concept of money.

Leon takes the initiative to check on Hotspur, who is undergoing repairs at the dock near the tavern. He speaks to once of the crewmembers whom he recognises as one of Hotspur’s crew, “When will she be ready to sail again?”

“Later today,” is the reply. “Once repairs to the crow’s nest are finished.” The crow’s nest, of course, was the part of the ship most badly damaged by the storm.

Lyle and Philippe play volleyball on the beach. Leon is invited to play, but refuses. “I’m doing my best to get us moving again,” he replies, angrily, though he cannot help but notice the sun shining onto Philippe’s torso, which reveals depth and texture of his pectoral muscles.

The match continues for three games. Philippe wins the first game, with Leon watching from his position high up in Hotspur’s rigging. Lyle takes the second two games, and both Lyle and Philippe are having fun. They begin a fourth game, but the ball contacts with Philippe’s horn and pops loudly.

Meanwhile, Clara and Shroomie walk around the port town in daylight. They find nothing out of the ordinary as they wander the quiet streets, but then, the thought occurs to Clara, which she shares with Shroomie, “Where are all the people? This is a ghost town!”

The two of them make their way back to the pub where they spent the previous evening and night. The barmaid is alone in the saloon, slowly making her way around the room cleaning up after the previous day’s visitors. There appears to be little work to occupy her, as the establishment was not well patronised the previous evening. She greets Clara and Shroomie, happy to have some company as she carries out her tasks.

“Walking around the town, we’ve noticed that there are very few people, why is this?” asks Clara.

“The town used to be home to the temple of healing,” begins the barmaid. “Visitors would flock here to be cured of their ailments, and the locals, as well as enjoying the benefits of the temple, would provide for the visitors. Food, board, and so on.”

“But what happened?” asks Shroomie, the story having captured his attention.

The barmaid’s mood changes. She replies, solemnly, “The lamias arrived.”

“Lamias?” asks Clara, confused.

“Lamias. They have the lower part of a beast and the upper part of a human and all the qualities of both turned to evil. They cast a spell to change the appearance of the sacred temple, which is actually a ruin, to make it look new, using the magic crystal. Then they killed all the visitors they could find, and of course, the visitors stopped.”

Clara is shocked, but collected, at the news. “But hasn’t anyone tried talking? Opening a dialogue?”

“Maybe that’s how they died,” offers Shroomie, not entirely unhelpfully.

“Thank you for your time,” says Clara, wary not to upset the barmaid. “Just one question before we make our way; how can we find the temple?”

“Oh, I would not recommend a visit,” says the barmaid, hastily. “But in better times, I would be directing you to the path through the forest and to the other side of the island; it is easy to find and leads straight to the temple.”

“Thank you,” says Clara, gathering her backpack and leading Shroomie out of the door.

Clara rallies the party, fetching Leon, with some protest, from Hotspur, and Lyle and Philippe from the beach. She leads them to the path described by the barmaid. From here, Lyle takes an enthusiastic lead. Shroomie stays nervously at the back of the group, before leaving and turning back to the town. The rest of the party press on, following the path through the woods.

Before long, the wooded path opens into a wide clearing of long grass. Lyle, leading the party and keeping a sharp eye out, is first to spot someone lying in the grass. He rushes over, the rest of the party following him. They all see that the figure is not just lying in the grass; his wounds tell of a violent attack by an animal. Leaving the man now, for there is little that the party can do immediately, they remain on their guard as they approach the temple.

2023-04-11

As they move closer to the temple, or rather, the illusion of the temple, the party can see that it takes the form of a giant, white hexagon with many irregular rooms jutting out from it. Between them and the temple is a pond of crystal clear fresh water. Standing in the portico of the temple entrance, but close enough that the party can now see him clearly, is a figure. Lyle waves a greeting to him.

The man, well aware of the party’s presence, as though he has been waiting patiently for them, replies, “Hello, travellers. My name is Jarik. I am here to welcome you to the temple.”

“Us?” asks Lyle, confused.

“Indeed,” replies Jarik. His voice is calm and soothing. “It is my job to welcome anyone who passes, and to tell them the rules.”

Lyle’s confusion fails to abate, which Jarik picks up on, and continues, “To enter the temple, you must first walk through the water.”

Clara interjects, “Is it poison?”

Jarik is offended by the question, though he tries not to let it show. Instead he bends down and plunges his hand into the water, showing that it is not poisoned. Then, in a swift and calculated motion, sends a barrage of tiny droplets of the perfectly clear water flying at Clara. She is embarrassed, but otherwise unharmed.

The whole party take off their shoes and walk through the pond. The water is cool and refreshing. Upon exiting the water, Jarik gives them each a pair of sandals, which fit each member of the party as perfectly as though they had been made around a last. All put on their sandals, except Shroomie, who continues playing and splashing in the pools, much to the annoyance of everyone else.

At the portico, the group are directed towards the reception desk. They make their way through the decadent hallway, the soles of their new sandals clacking against the marble floor, their eyes dazzled by the reflections from gold leaf decor of oil lamps suspended at every corner of the room, and with its hexagonal design, there are a lot of corners. Intrigued by the unusual shape of the room, Clara shouts “Hello!” to discover an echo.

The room replies “Hello!” back to her. She steps forward to the reception desk, where a human receptionist is waiting patiently.

“Welcome to the temple of healing,” says the receptionist, a friendly but professional smile on her face. “My name is Braxit. How may I assist you?”

“Could you heal us of our tendency to be annoying?” asks Clara, seriously.

Braxit does not know what to make of this, but before they have a chance to reply, Lyle interrupts. “Who’s your boss? Do they pay well?”

“Er… Yes?” replies Braxit, bewildered.

“Do you know anything of lamias?” asks Shroomie, having finished playing in the puddles.

“Er… No?” replies Braxit, in a tone which suggests they are lying. “Anyway, what can I do for you?” he asks, eager to distract attention.

“I would like a massage,” says Philippe, winking towards Braxit as he says “With a happy ending.”

“Very good, sir,” unaware that Philippe may not receive exactly what we wants. “The priest-doctor will see you, please proceed to the ward.”

Lyle is scared of doctors, and, deciding that he feels safest in the presence of Philippe, follows him to the ward, and then into a private consultation room. Philippe becomes too embarrassed to say anything to Lyle, presuming that he will leave of his own accord at some point. Instead, the receptionist pushes Clara the consultation room behind him.

Lyle and Philippe shift their gaze away from the priest-doctor to see Clara enter, and then turn back to see, where a moment ago stood a priest-doctor, now stands a manticore. Clara, quickest of the three to think, casts Thunder Wave. The flimsy walls of the consultation room fall to the ward floor, giving the three a moment to put distance between themselves and the beast. The nurses on the ward step back calmly to the edge of the room to watch the spectacle.

The manticore entangles Lyle in its grasp and pushes him to the ground. As Lyle is about to make forceful contact with the ground, he is saved from injury by a burst of magic, which turns him into a frog.

Philippe makes an brusque attack on the manticore with his rapier, but fails to make contact. The manticore, angered at the attack, spins around quickly, disturbing glass medical instruments on the consultant’s desk and sending them to shatter on the hard floor. It continues its rotation, making contact with Philippe, wounding him.

Shroomie bursts into the room, catching the manticore by surprise and hitting it with his great axe. Clara doubles down on Shroomie’s magnificent attack by casting Shatter.

Lyle, getting used to their giant frog form, swallows Braxit the receptionist whole. Philippe makes an attempt to deafen the manticore, but this fails. Instead, Philippe makes a second attack with his rapier. This one hits its mark. The manticore screams in agony and lashes out violently. Philippe is flung to the floor and is knocked out. Shroomie is standing too close to the manticore and is also hurt in the attack.

Clara, Lyle and Shroomie attack the minotaur simultaneously. It has nowhere to run and too many enemies to attack at once. The manticore falls to the floor as a lamia; it was an illusion all along. As each of the party look away from the manticore and back to the lamia, the illusion is broken for them.

Lyle rushes to Philippe’s aid. The manticore may have been an illusion, but fortunately some of the medical supplies in the room are not. Lyle takes pleasure in bandaging Philippe’s beautifully scultped abs, whilst Clara and Shroomie investigate the adjacent rooms.

Having seen that the manticore was an illusion, they are now able to see through the many other illusions within the temple. The ward is much dirtier than it had appeared earlier. It is certainly not a suitable place to treat the sick.

Returning to the centre of the temple of healing, the party see all of the rooms they had passed through for what they truly are. An oasis of calm has become a dark and forboding forest. Something moves ahead of them; they have been detected.

The group are keen to avoid another encounter this soon, and search for an escape route. Lyle, Clara and Philippe go to the nearest door out of the quadrangle. It is covered in burn marks. Lyle pushes against the door. It opens into a pitch black room. Suspicious of what might be inside, Lyle throws a rock into the room first. He is rewarded with a jet of flame, which he manages to narrowly avoid before it is of an intensity to injure him.

Lyle casts Mould Earth to form a shield ahead of himself. Using the shield, he manages to enter the room without setting off the trap. He leads Clara and Philippe far enough into the room to see that the trap is actually a statue of a dragon, with soot marks around the mouth where the jet of fire originated. Intrigued by the workings of the statue, Lyle moves closer and places his hand on one of the wings. As he investigates the workings, he presses slightly too hard against the statue, reactivating the trap. A second jet of fire blasts out of the dragon’s mouth, this time singeing all three members of the group. Lyle, thinking quickly, casts Mould Earth a second time, reforming his shield in order to clog the workings of the statue.

The three leave the statue room via a second door which opens directly to a staircase, which takes them onto the roof. They find a rooftop garden with a pool. Sat beside the pool, with their feet in the water, are three ladies. They appear charmed by the mere presence of the three adventurers. Lyle walks towards them, greets them nobly, and kisses the outstretched hand of one. “I am at your service, ma’am,” he says, as the pull of the lady’s hand makes him feel compelled to get into the pool himself, despite the fact that he cannot swim. He is weighed down by his armour and begins to drown.

Clara and Philippe, recognising that Lyle has been cursed, rush to his aid. Philippe plunges one giant yet dainty hand into the water, wrapping his fingers around Lyle’s arm so as not to damage his immaculate nails, and pulls him out. Lyle, confused at what is happening around him, begins a contest with Philippe for the right to be chivalrous to the three ladies. As Lyle offers ‘rock, paper. scissors’ as a form of contest, Philippe looks over to the three ladies. From his new angle, standing in the pool, he sees that they do hot have their feet in the water as he had assumed, but scaly tails with fins. The three ladies are in fact mermaids. Scared at the damage the mermaid’s curse might have done to Lyle, Philippe picks him up clear of the surface of the water and throws him, as carefully as he can, to Clara.

Shroomie, lost in the central quadrangle of the temple of healing, turns a corner and comes face to face with the presence that had detected the party earlier. In the dim light of the quad, he can see that the presence is a minotaur, several times Shroomie’s height, and fierce. Shroomie, acting foolishly, makes an aggressive attack against the minotaur, but he misses. The minotaur retaliates instantly, dealing damage to Shroomie and leaving him unconscious.

A dark cloud descends upon the temple of healing. Its sudden presence strikes fear into all those below it and puts a stop to all activity on the ground. Out of the cloud, Sheogorath appears. Seeing that he is at risk of losing his entertainment at the hands of a minotaur, Sheogorath kills the minotaur himself, then revives Shroomie.

2023-04-25

Leon walks in to find the rest of the party engaged in battle. They are fighting what appears to him to be a sleek, steel robot, and two bandits.

“Don’t kiss her!” shouts Lyle. Leon is confused, until Lyle explains; “She’s a Lamia. She appears as whomever you desire.” Leon does not disclose to the rest of the party what he sees.

Philippe, also quiet on the topic of whom he sees, lands a skillful attack on the lamia with his rapier. Shroomie severely wounds one of the bandits with his axe. Leon casts Witch Bolt, establishing a constant beam of lightning between himself and the enemy. Philippe engages the other bandit, missing with his first attack.

The lamia, angered at the attack, strikes out at Leon, wounding him. Lyle intimidates the lamia, sullying their confidence and allowing Leon to continue his Witch Bolt attack.

Clara tries to attack the lamia, but misses, hitting Lyle instead. Chaos breaks out. The lamia strikes at Clara, who is now seriously wounded. Lyle, having previously intimidated the lamia, boldly steps up after Clara’s acctidental strike on him and makes a successful attack on the lamia.

Leon finishes the fight by casting Eldritch Blast on the lamia. It falls to the floor, exhausted and unable to fight.

The party are tired after the battle and take time to rest. “It’s a good thing Leon brought those sandwiches with him,” says Lyle, winking. Leon scowls, he did not think to bring food with him.

They are all sat under a tree outside the temple of healing. Above them, its light breaking through the thick canopy, a crystal glows green by its own magic. It appears to be the source of the magic creating the illusion around the temple. The party vote unanimously to smash the crystal. In doing so, they end the illusion. Walking back through the ruined temple, the party find some items that were previously hidden by the illusion. They take a potion of greater healing, a mace, and three hundred gold pieces, which they divide equally.

The group walk back across the island to the tavern where the adventure started. Leon is keen to explain to the bartender how the five of them defeated the lamias and dispelled the illusion. “Wait here,” says the bartender, as he steps from the bar into the back room. He returns a moment later with an orange sword. “A previous adventurer left this; it is of more use to you, I believe.” Leon takes the sword. “Its colour changes from orange to blue t sunset. I know nothing more about it.”

Leon stows the sword carefully in his pack. He leads the group outside, to see that repairs to the ship are complete. The captain has been talking to a minotaur on deck, whom Clara recognises as the one they met earlier in the temple.

“We are all present and ready to set sail,” announces the captain, who then begins shouting orders at his crew.

Shortly after getting underway, the party notice caves along the coast that appear to be the ones described to them. The captain refuses to stop near the caves for them to investigate, but instead provides them with an old dinghy named ‘Leslie’. With the help of the crew, Leslie is lowered over the side of the ship with the adventurers on board. They undo the lines and set off, over the sea, to the caves and adventure.

2023-05-09

Philippe takes the oars of Leslie, and his powerful strokes send her towards the caves. The rest of the crew open the rations provided for them by the captain.

Upon reaching the caves, Leon jumps out first and having gotten himself to dry land, begins pulling Leslie onto the beach.

The party look around at their new environment. Clara turns to observe th sea at just the wrong moment and is rewarded with a wash of saltwater in her eyes, rendering her unable to see for the moment.

Taking a moment to acclimatise, the party see that they are in a large cave, with one side open to the sea. Although it is vast and open, the sunlight struggles to illuminate the far reaches of the interior. Clara casts Dancing Light, which produces four floating orbs of light, which she can direct around the cave as required.

The orbs of light reveal that part of the cave is not as natural as it appeared from the outside. A manmade wall attracts the party’s attention. An archway in the wall leads onto a long corridor. The party line up in order to investigate the corridor. Lyle goes first. Shroomie follows, being able to see easily over Lyle’s head. Leon follows Shroomie, being able to see clearly over his and Ley’s heads. Philippe follows Leon. Finally, Clara follows Philippe, ignoring the instruction from Philippe to “Hold onto my tail.”

Shroomie, having the best historical knowledge of the party, can tell by the architecture that the structures within the cave were probably made by elves. Although Clara’s lights reach one hundred and twenty feet, the tunnel is long enough that the group cannot see to the end.

Walking further into the tunnel, the party encounter a fork. They must choose to go left or right. The few rats they see crawling about in the tunnel run hurriedly to the right, and so the party decide to follow.

Before long, Philippe finds a door, designed to blend in with the corridor wall. Philippe knocks. Shroomie barges past Leon and, without a moment’s hesitation, opens the door. On the other side, is a staircase leading up.

Lyle leads up the staircase to a second door, this time knocking and waiting. There is no response. Shroomie, having waited long enough, barges in. He finds himself in a storeroom, piled high with boxes bearing the royal crest. Shroomie opens thr nearest of the boxees and finds that it is full of fresh vegetables. Clara, excited at the prospect of having comething to eat that’s not fish, hovers over Shroomie.

Seemingly out of nowhere, a guards runs into the room. “How did you get in here?” he begins, because he falls to the floor. The reason for his fall is clear; a brigh, poison dart protrudes from his neck, having been fired accurately from behind him. Lyle suggests that there might be a trap in the room, but it seems unlikely that the guard would be unaware of the room’s security features.

The assassin makes himself known to the party. “My name is Verrick,” he says, by way of introduction. “Who are you, and what are you doing here?”

Stunned at the question, Philippe asks, “We could ask you the same?”

“I am here to kill King Kasmia, of Daggerfall,” replies Verrick, as though his role of assassin were not obvious. Shroomie notices the design of the brooch securing Verrick’s dark cloak. Verrick acknowledges Shroomie’s gaze. “The Blackthorn Gang believe that the king is not fit to rule.”

Lyle moves quickly. He casts Entangle on Verrick. Before Verrick can react, he is restrained in a bundle on the floor of the storeroom. The party fall silent, as they hear footsteps outside. “Let’s get on the guards’ good side,” says Lyle.

The guards walk past the storeroom, the party remaining undetected. Lyle leads them out of the storeroom and up a second staircase to the throne room, where they encounter a guard standing in front of the door. “What do you want?” asks the guard, showing little interest in the prisoner being escorted by Philippe.

“We have captured an assassin, making an attempt on the life of the king,” announces Lyle, proudly. “He has already killed one of your colleagues.”

The guard takes more interest, now that he has this fact. “You shall have an audience with the king,” he announces. Two more guards are summoned and take the assassin, Verrick, away. The first guard steps into the throne room. A moment later, he steps out again, and invites the party inside.

Inside, the throne room is decorated with elaborate drapes in blue and purple. Lyle bows deeply to the king, who is sat on his throne which is on a raised dais at the far end of the room. “Good afternoon, your majesty.” The slight deviation from protocol, addressing the king before he has spoken, goes unnoticed in the situation that the party have saved his life and brought him a prisoner. “We caught an assassin.”

“Indeed, he is being questioned as we speak,” replies the king, kindly.

Leon cuts straight to the point. “Majesty, we are stranded here after being left without a ship. As recompense for capturing the assassin, may we borrow one of yours?” A murmur spreads throughout the crowd.

The king thinks for a moment. “Yes, we have a spare ship here. She is yours.”

Leon bows and, with the rest of the party, join the assemled courtiers for introductions and small talk. Philippe, having, until recently, been a regular courtier himself, provides Leon with introductions, and instruction in the sport of gentlemanly conversation. Leon does not excel and before long the group follow Lyle’s direction to the library.

Poring over the many tomes on all topics, the party find out that the king’s palace was originally built, as Shroomie suspected, by elves. More recent history tells that, although the king is well liked, today’s assassination attempt was not the first. It was, however, the first by the Blackthorn Gang, who seem to have gained momentum quickly.

2023-05-23

The party are in high spirits. They have received a gift, in the form of a ship, from the king. Enthusiastic about the journey ahead, all of the group begin making preparations. Lyle and Shroomie fetch all that they need from the library; Lyle looks at charts, whilst Shroomie searches for a book on sailing.

Inspired by the names of famous vessels which have taken to sea over centuries, Shroomie decides that their ship will need a suitably fierce name. He settles on ‘La Belle Sardine’, and goes to paint it into the hull in bold letters, before realising that he cannot spell. Leon, sensitive to Shroomie’s plight, takes over. The rest of the party organise rations for the voyage.

Clara requests her own room. As they are short crewed for such a large vessel, there is no obstacle in giving Clara a spacious cabin.

Before long, ‘La Belle Sardine’ is crewed and ready to commence her sea trials. Lyle nominates himself as the vessel’s captain and stations himself in the crow’s nest and Leon at the helm. Everyone else helps to cast off, with Shroomie putting the knowledge gained in his brief visit to the library to good use. Within moments of casting off, everyone hears a loud, cracking sound. They look down, over the sides of ‘La Belle Sardine’, and see that a fishing boat has run into them.

The harbourmaster shouts, not at the amateur crew, but at the helmsman of the fishing boat. “Oi! What are you doing!” The amateur crew are relieved, as they understand that the error was not on their part. They set out, and at Captain Lyle’s instruction, use the compass to follow a course due East.

Leon, using his knowledge of sailing and his analytical, almost computational brain, throws out a knotted line to measure the ship’s speed. This, coupled with the compass readings, allows Leon to plot their actual course with some accuracy. The crew spot an island on the horizon, and decide that it is their destination.

La Belle Sardine, with Leon at the helm but with assistance from Clara, docks successfully in the small harbour. A gangplank is lowered. The party disembark and make their way from the harbour into a large village on the island. Standing in the village susqare, they are pleasantly surprised by the range of shops, taverns and eateries available to them. Lyle, spotting a hat shop, abandons the rest of the party for a moment to pursue an important errand.

“Do you have any pirate hats?” He asks the man behind the counter. “Black, with three corners.”

Looking around the hat shop, there are hats of all kinds. Top hats and bowlers for men, elaborately decorated fascinators for women, numerous day caps for any and all of the citizens of the village to wear. “No, we do not have any hats like that,” replies the hat seller. “There’s a skeleton hanging by the dock wearing the type of hat you describe, perhaps you could take that one?”

Lyle returns to the party, who have engaged in conversation with a town guard. The guard does not seem to be viewing the party with any suspicion. The village, being by the sea, receives many visitors from all over the world, a few of them as unusual as the band of adventurers who have arrived today.

Shroomie asks the guard, “Has anything unusual being going on lately? Anything that we could look into?”

The guard ponders for a moment. Most visitors arrive, spend some time buying and selling at the local shops, then leave. Few arrive searching for quests. The guard, fully composed, takes advantage of the opportunity presented to him. “While you are here, you might wish to investigate the woods to the North,” he says. “The weather there is much hotter than in the village, even though the woods are only a couple of miles away.”

“Gotcha!” says Lyle, excitedly, as he leads the party out of the village on the one path which leads to the North.

Not long after leaving the village, the group reach the edge of a pine forest. As they enter and continue North, the temperature begins to rise. Clara, whom, as a druid, is attuned to nature, notes that the forest is very quiet. She would expect to hear all sorts of animals inhabiting such a lush forest; the lack of them is unsettling.

Before long, though, the party see things which are even more unsettling. The trees, rather than being solely pine as they have seen so far, give way to mostly pine but interspersed with trees made of candy. As the party move deeper into the forest, the candy trees become more frequent and the pine trees thin out, until the group are surrounded entirely by candy trees. Clara detects a strong magic in their sugary branches. Where the forest is thin that enough light hits the forest floor for grass to grow, the grass grows pink.

Lyle boldly picks a candy tree and climbs it, taking care not to get syrup on his hands. As he climbs, the rest of the party notice a howling sound, the first sign of animals in the forest that they have heard for a while. The howling seems to be getting louder, until it is loud enough that the source should have come into view, but it hasn’t.

Shroomie looks down at the forest floor around him and finds the source; two, what appear to be, clockwork, toy wolves. Their faces are permanently smiling, contrary to the vicious sounds they are making. Shroomie, not taking the hint, reaches down and pets the wolves. They return the gesture by attacking him violently. Clara, stressed at the situation, casts ‘Animal Friendship’ on the two wolves. She succeeds, and now Lyle, returned from climbing the tree, begins petting the toy wolves.

Continuing North, with their two new companions in tow, the group come to a clearing, full of long, pink grass. Clara can feel that the magic affecting the trees is at its strongest here. In the middle of the clearing is what appears to be a tear in the Universe. It manifests as an edgeless portal, which one might use to step, seamlessly, from this world into another.

Next to the portal is a deceased unicorn. Its horn has been mostly taken away. Lyle has the belief that unicorn blood has magical properties. He carefully, respectfully, licks some of the blood from the unicorn’s magnificent mane.

The lack of the unicorn’s horn, informs Clara, is significant. “A unicorn’s horn may grant just one wish. The question is, what did the thief wish for?”

“Candy trees? A portal?” offers Leon, just looking at the unexpected features around him.

Before discussing the safety of the portal, or making precautions should any danger be encountered on the other side, Shroomie steps through the portal and into the other world beyond. The rest of the party, without questioning him, follow closely behind.

2023-06-13

The party emerge from the portal, as they expected they would do, in another world. As they were in the world they have just left, they are in a forest. It is clearly a different world, as the candy trees and pink grass, which began as a sparse scattering in the world they have just left, make up the entire forest in this world. Also, close to this side of the portal, but not present in the first world, is a campsite with the remnants of a fire. A small figure stands, next to the fire, kicking the embers until they go out.

“Hello?” says Lyle, already disoriented by this brightly coloured world. “I’m Lyle.”

The figure is startled, as though he believed himself to be completely alone. He turns around quickly. “Hello!” he says. He pauses, staring at Lyle for a moment. Lyle, and the rest of the party, stare back. “I’m Capone.”

The former campfire behind Capone begins to spit embers at his ankles. He jumps away, and then says, “Well, we’d better get going! Oh, if you’re interested in what’s been going on here,” his voice becomes a whisper, “You need to see what I’ve found over here.”

The rest of the party are not as enthusiastic as Capone. After what they’ve seen so far today, it will take a lot to impress them. Nevertheless, they all follow Capone quietly, until the reasaon for his zeal becomes apparent. Laying before them, on the forest floor, is a second dead unicorn. Like the first, its horn has been removed, a sign that it was hunted for the magical properties of the horn. The group stand, respectfully, around the fallen beast. It still carries a presence, even though it is deceased.

A peculiar smell drifts towards the group. They look up, and see that it is a cigar, in the process of being smoked by a rather rough looking goblin. He wears heavy, leather armour like a second layer of skin above his own, which is at least as thick, with hard, green scales which form a natural armour. His hair is greasy and bulked out with weird red vines, which move as he walks, but to anyone looking closely, would appear also to move of their own accord when the goblin is still. None of the party have noticed this subtlety yet.

The goblin takes a long look at each member of the party. He is flanked by four more, heavily armoured goblin soldiers, who stand in a line behind him, alert and ready to take action. The leader speaks. “I’m Scar Face,” he says, “And you would do well to keep yourselves to yourselves. Do not interfere in my business.”

Scar Face turns away from the party and leaves. Once he is a safe distance behind his hench-goblins, they also turn their backs on the party, some of them spitting on the ground first.

With Scar Face and his hench-goblins well out of view, the party continue along the path in the other direction. After a mile or so, they come to the goblins’ previous camp. Next to the remains of the campfire is a pile, which Lyle estimates to be twenty feet high, though a heap of that size would be truly horrifying, even by goblins’ standards. The animals in the pile are of all sorts, most of which the party have not seen before, but they are clearly of this world; unicorns, mostly with their horns removed; small, stuffed foxes and bears, previously animated by the magical for which permeates this world. It defies belief that anyone would want to harm something so beautiful.

To the other side of the camp, two live unicorns are trapped in a cage. They are distressed and frightened by the pile of dead animals opposite. Capone approaches them, cautiously so as not to startle them. He begins picking the lock to the cage.

Watching the party, its anger rising at their inspection of the dead animals, is a lone wolf. It bolts towards the party. Lyle sees it first, and attempts to distract it and draw it away from the main party, and away from Capone who is busy picking the lock. He looses an arrow at the wolf, which grazes its target, but attracts its attention.

Capone hastens his lock picking, to free the unicorns quicker. In doing so, he makes enough noise to make the wolf aware of his presence. The rest of the party realise this, and they take quick action to defend his work. Clara turns around quickly to take up the defense for Capone, and in doing so, hits Lyle. Once able to defend Capone, Clara begins chanting, and this inspires Lyle to deal the fatal blow to the wolf.

Capone releases the unicorns. One is a foal, the other is older, possibly its parent. Lyle has picked up two unicorn horns from the camp. He kneels in front of the unicorns and presents the horns to them, respectfully. The elder unicorn nods in acknowledgement and, taking both horns in his mouth, digs a hole in the soft ground to bury them.

Together, the entire party return to the portal between the candy world and the world from which they came. It seems that the unicorn horn’s one wish was used for entry to the candy world. Now that the unicorns have buried it, the wish slowly undoes itself. The candy plants retreat into the portal. As the party pass through, with their new ally Capone, the portal closes behind them, leaving the forest much cooler than it was when they first arrived.

The party return to the village, where they had left La Belle Sardine moored. With the thanks of the townspeople, they make short order of preparing their ship for onward travel, and sailing off into the sunset.

2023-06-27

Capone and Philippe, who had stayed on the ship, make their introductions. Together, they navigate La Belle Sardine to the North, searching for land. The voyage is long, and the crew make several changes of the watch. Nobody excels at helming La Belle Sardine, which is to be expected, as none of the crew have prior experience of sailing a large vessel. Except Clara, who during her watch, saves the party from drowning by avoiding some dangerous rocks.

Each of the party manages to rest fully during the long voyage.

From his lookout in the crow’s nest, Captain Lyle spots a ship in the distance. He shouts to Philippe, who is at the helm, to steer close to the unidentified vessel. Philippe halts La Belle Sardine alongside the other ship.

Skilfully, and without hesitation, Lyle takes a rope and swings across onto the other ship, landing perfectly on two feet. Philippe lowers a ramp, kindly inviting Clara, Capone and Shroomie to cross before himself. The upper deck of the ship is quiet.

Lyle, again taking initiative, opens the hatch to the deck below. He climbs down the ladder and heads for the stern, where the most interesting cabins are usually located. Through two sets of doors, he enters first the officer’s mess, and then the captain’s study. On the table, unguarded, is the ship’s log. A quill pen rests between the two open pages. An inkwell, left open by someone in a hurry to leave, has dried out. Lyle scans through the most recent log entries.

I am close to knowing the whereabouts of the legendary treasure…

Keeping a close watch on the librarian, he appears to have a crush on me…

Should never have gone to cursed treasure

Carl never went to clown college

Whilst the log is very confusing to Lyle, who knows nothing of the absent captain or any of the absent crew, the message of the legendary treasure is unignorable.

Lyle notes down the most interesting passages from the ship’s log in his own notebook, then leaves the study to rejoin the rest of his crew.

The crew have been searching the ship for any sign of her own crew, but have found nothing. The stores of gunpowder and cannonballs have been depleted, suggesting that the ship was involved in a large sea battle; however, if that were the case, and her crew were lost, how is the ship completely unscathed? As captain Lyle ponders this, he feels a shudder. A sudden feeling of death comes to him, as though from a past life. Those around him can sense this and intuitively step back. The feeling even reaches the unicorn, travelling on La Belle Sardine, who moves as far as he can away from the spooky ship.

The party tie the mysterious ship up alongside La Belle Sardine, leaving them free to continue their investigations without the two ships floating apart. At the moment they finish securing the ships, they feel the sea begin to roll unnervingly beneath them. The smooth surface of the water bulges upwards and then parts, as a third ship, previously unseen in the depths, rises out of the water.

Lyle, quick-witted, jumps from the side of La Belle Sardine, changing his form in mid-air to that of an octopus, before streamlining himself, tentacles trailing, and diving into the water. In a swift motion, he swims in a parabola through the water and lifts himself out into the air on the other side, next to the third ship. Using the suckers on his tentacles, he lands on the side of the ship and climbs up to the deck. He glides onto the deck behind a tall, unknown figure. The figure turns, revealing a pirate of high rank, possibly captain. He wears a tricorn hat and keeps his hair and beard long.

The pirate moves fast, and grabs Lyle in his hands, forcing him back into his original, halfling form.

Lyle, more surprised than the pirate at this encounter, says, “I didn’t know there was anyone on this boat.” He is held in the air by just one of the pirate’s strong arms. Lyle continues. “What a… wonderful beard you have!”

The pirate laughs and then, as if to mock Lyle for complimenting the beard, he sets his own beard alight. He drops Lyle, who scurries away before making an effort to compose himself. The pirate’s burning hair reveals that, below the hair, there is no flesh, only bone. The pirate captain, and all of his crew, are skeletons.

The boat that they stand on is cursed, surrounded in so many layers of magic that to understand each one would be like peeling back the layers of an onion one by one, until the onion is no more. This is the thought that occurs to Shroomie. As he asks, out loud, “Is this ship even real?” he discovers that it is not, and falls cleanly through the top deck. When Shroomie realises that he is falling through air, not water, and that there must be something holding back the ocean, the ship’s physical presence returns for him. He lands, two decks below, and climbs the ladders up to the top deck, returning to find Lyle talking with the captain.

“Get out of these waters!” the ghost captain bellows at Lyle.

“Could you be more specific?” asks Lyle, fear finally starting to creep into his voice.

The captain slaps a chart down on top of a crate, tearing one of the corners as he does so. Shroomie is about to question the physicality of the chart, and whether of not the tear is real, but thinks better of it. The captain draws a circle in thick, red ink that appears to have come from nowhere, and hands the chart to Lyle. “There,” he says, simply.

Once the party have looked at the chart, the captain picks up Lyle, Shroomie and Capone, and one by one, throws them back to La Belle Sardine. He casts a glance at Clara and Philippe, who decide that it would be best if they return to their ship themselves.

The captain, in one last act of showmanship, sets fire to the lines connecting the ships, leaving La Belle Sardine once again floating freely in the ocean.